Saturday, November 8, 2008

Venting

For those who are about to not care, I say...ok.

In the process of turning Ute into a future blog post (you'll see), I've come across a few difficulties. Considering the process has lasted since, oh, December 2007, one more snafu isn't about to phase me. It will still bother me. And I have yelled. I also swore, loudly this evening. This will come as news to those who wake up every morning with astonishment that gravity is still in effect. I swear when I'm alone. A lot. It's one of those things that everyone does, nay?

Back to the frustration, and I'm leaving out a whole shitload of frustration. Anyways, the gear ratio of 41x16 is not working on my frame. The chain is either too long or too short. ''No problem'', I said, ''I'll simply use my 17T cog that's currently napping on Sheldon Brownie''.

Cog:

By the by, this had been my plan last week, frustrations in every direction prevented me from doing so. I chose not to share it with you then. Still today, I shall spare you the details.

Back once again to the frustration. Tonight I was armed with a VAR 16.

VAR 16:Mine isn't quite as badass as the one pictured. First of all, mine's new. Second, it has no red paint. Rather, it is all silver, with black rubber plastic at the handles. Anyways, it's an adjustable lockring remover. Why did I get an adjustable lockring remover? For the answer, please refer earlier in the post where I wrote: ''frustration/...\I shall spare you the details".

With the help of my virgin VAR 16 lockring remover, I removed the lockring that was guarding the 17T cog. The next part is when most people go: ''Shite, how the fuck am I going to twist off a pointy round thing (cog)?''. Most people don't have a VAR 16. Those who do inevitably also own a chain whip.

Chain whip:

A chain whip can be used for many things, including removing a cog. Luckily for this post, my cog is a track cog. My chain whip is a ''10-speed'' chain whip. Which means that the chain and cog did not perfectly aline...pffffft. Even then, it was highly likely that the cog had simply been over tightened by my riding.

Here is the point of the post. My solution, created in my head and confirmed on the internet is to the ride the wheel (on whose hub is the cog) and SLAM a skid of HELL 3000, thereby loosening the cogs grip on the hub.

I may get hurt.

8 comments:

Dementor said...

yeah sure, you do that.




So what about tomorrow?

6 p.m. at Boner's?

Napoleon Bonerpants said...

6 is perfect

Anonymous said...

i didn't understand anything it that post. i feel really dumb all of a sudden. thanks!

Dementor said...

so how did the skid of death go?
Do you still have an ankle?

Prior to using your body as a cog remover, did you try to give the thing the old hammer tapping trick?

Dementor said...

Tu devrais essayer de monter sur ta bicyclette à l'envers et pédaler avec tes mains pendant que tes pieds tiennent le tout en équilibre en gardant la roue immobile avec tes dents, ou tout autre outil plus efficace.

Master of the Craw said...

I would pay good money to see that happen. And by good money I mean no money at all because I have none.

Barbarosa said...

What's the old hammer tapping trick?

Dementor said...

Take the hammer.
Aim at the object to be removed.
Tap it.