Wednesday, September 30, 2009

One the one hand...

I'm not a violent person. On the other hand I've gotten enough bikes stolen that I kind of enjoyed this:

Bike Thief vs Street Justis from triple on Vimeo.

Albert Jacquard/Yoda à l'UQAM





Le 6 octobre prochain, Monsieur Albert Jacquard, prononcera la conférence "Le compte à rebours a-t-il commencé".

À 19 h 30, à la salle Marie-Gérin-Lajoie, UQAM

Des billets au tarif étudiant de 12 $ sont en vente à la CoopUQAM (pas de frais de réseau) et au point de vente Admission. Admission générale : 20$
« Le compte à rebours a-t-il commencé ? »

Monsieur Jacquard abordera sa conférence sous l’angle suivant :

Longtemps l’humanité a vécu en pensant qu’elle avait tout son temps, que le progrès n’en finirait pas de transformer le monde à notre avantage, que les hommes seraient toujours plus riches, plus beaux, plus performants et que nous avions le droit de prélever à l’envi toutes les richesses de la planète sans jamais entamer son capital.

Cette époque est révolue. Nous savons maintenant que le temps nous est compté et qu’à force de travailler contre nous-mêmes, nous risquons de fabriquer une Terre où aucun de nous ne voudra vivre!

Albert Jacquard passe en revue les questions à propos desquelles il est urgent de procéder à une refonte complète de nos habitudes.

Selon Albert Jacquard : « Il semble, dans notre société, que la seule dynamique possible ne puisse être alimentée que par l’opposition des humains les uns aux autres. Il n’est question que de la victoire des meilleurs alors que les confrontations sont plus collectives qu’individuelles, alors qu’elles impliquent plus de coopération que de compétition. » Ainsi, mieux vaut une réussite solidaire qu’un exploit solitaire!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Machete




So I gave Pants his birthday present yesterday. Its the first in a series of apocalyptic gifts. When I bought it the guy at Surplus told me he sold dozens of those daily, and as a token of his words, his sold me the last one he had. This means there's a shitload of honest and not so honest citizens in this town with machetes in their house.
Given that the apocalypse is generally predicted to be happening within the next 15 years, I don't know about you, but the thought of having only a couple of kitchen knives and some 15mm wrenches to defend myself while all the other bastards are armed to the teeth is quite worrying.
So I call for an arm race.
I say Pants takes care of the blades and I'll be chief of firearms.

Also, Pants, next time one of those bell ringing trucks pass down your street to sharpen people's blades, have them sharpen your machete. Try stepping out with a cigar and camo pants, and look like you mean not to be fucked with.

Quote of the Moment




"Do not burn yourself out. Be as I am-a reluctant enthusiast...a
part time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of
yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not
enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it.
While you can. While it is still there. So get out there and hunt
and fish and mess around with your friends, ramble out yonder and
explore the forests, encounter the grizz, climb the mountains, bag
the peaks. Run the rivers, breathe deep of that yet sweet and lucid
air, sit quietly for a while and contemplate the precious stillness,
that lovely, mysterious and awesome space. Enjoy yourselves, keep
your brain in your head and your head firmly attached to the body,
the body active and alive, and I promise you this much: I promise
you this one sweet victory over our enemies, over those deskbound
people with their hearts in a safe deposit box and their eyes
hypnotized by desk calculators. I promise you this: You will
outlive the bastards."
-Edward Abby

I don't know who this Edward Abby fellow is, but he sounds like a guy we could get along with.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Balance out the Force

Well I guess if nobody's gonna do it, I will.
The first frame of the previous video itself made me ashame of owning a penis, so I'm posting this to make us forget about it.
I figured viking melee combat was the only way to redeem this blog.


Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Sunday, September 20, 2009

God's creation

Scarier still

I can't believe I forgot about this. APHEX TWIN.



Now that shit is scary! There is just something about a man with an abnormally large nose and a little girl's body that just frightens me to the core.

Downright Frightening

You ever have those days when you waste time, your only free time, on the internet only to end up in some nether cyber region that makes you kind of uncomfortable and ashamed?

Well, just press play, ignore the video, and keep reading...



...So I was checking this forum for some shitty band to the sound of low fi black metal when I saw the scariest thing imaginable. You see, most forum users use clever icons such as this



this



or even this



But then, I saw the most frightening thing I have ever seen. THIS:



If you don't think it's that bad, replay the song in its entirety and just focus on it. It is some scary shit! I mean, look at it! What the hell is that?

It is when you reach this point in Cyberspace that you realize you need to go outside. I've been working too hard and been too stressed lately. Last night, I ordered me an anchovy pizza, for Christ's sake. Welcome to my Sunday morning. Welcome to rock bottom.

Friday, September 18, 2009

CBMD + CBME

METALLICA ARE COMING TO TOWN!

And I’m going this Sunday. Booya!

Also, September 27th is Cliff Burton Memorial Day. In order to properly celebrate, we will be having a Cliff Burton Memorial Evening on Saturday the 26th. Location to be determined.

To start the festivities, please enjoy the following lyrics and video.

To Live Is to Die

When a man lies he murders
Some part of the world
These are the pale deaths which
Men miscall their lives
All this I cannot bear
To witness any longer
Cannot the kingdom of salvation
Take me home

-Cliff Burton.



Oh, and we'll also be celebrating Bonerpant's birthday or something.

Gnat

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

We're going to need to nerd it up at some point.

The following two games were released this week:





They're both multiplayer games and are both bound to get even more awesome when really drunk. What do you guys think?

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Plaidoirie d'un imbécile

Etre stupide, selon le petit Robert: qui est atteint d'une sorte d'inertie mentale; qui a peu d'intelligence ou de sensibilité.
Selon cette définition, il semblerait que la connerie soit une affection congénitale. Les imbéciles seraient donc aux prises avec une fatalité définitive que seule leur inertie mentale leur permet d'oublier. Il est important de souligner le caractère inéluctable de cette condition: on naît stupide, on ne le devient pas.
Il faudrait donc cesser de mépriser les gens stupides, et commencer à les considérer avec un peu de compassion. Sinon, ne risquerait-on pas de sombrer du côté des eugénistes? Parlons-en des eugénistes... Ces gens-là voudraient exterminer les crétins afin d'améliorer l'Espèce. Évidemment, ils ne se sont jamais demandé si leur propre manque de sensibilité ne fasse en sorte qu'ils se voient obligés de s'exterminer eux-mêmes, trop cons qu'ils sont pour se l'imaginer. Les eugénistes forment donc l'élite des tarés, et pour ne pas en faire partie, la seule issue est de les considérer avec une bienveillante commisération. N'était-ce pas le message du Christ lui-même? "Vous êtes tous cons, mais je vous aime comme vous êtes."
On pourrait cependant objecter que cette vision de la chose relève d'un déterminisme odieux, et que la définition même de l'humain est son libre arbitre, sa capacité de décider, de choisir ce qu'il deviendra. Dans cette perspective, une personne à l'intelligence fertile et douée de bon sens mais un peu impatiente pourrait, sans risque d'entrer dans le clan des salauds, mépriser de toutes ses forces l'espèce des crétins. Car ces crétins le seraient par choix, et non par fatalité.
L'apôtre de la Sagesse prônerait sans doute une approche plus mitigée devant l'être idiot. Il tenterait de déterminer si son débilisme est héréditaire ou s'il a été fabriqué. Mais même rendu là, si l'on considère le choix même de devenir crétin, c'est sans doute faire preuve d'idiotie, et on serait porté à croire qu'il n'existe qu'une seule vraie catégorie, celles des connards nés. L'apôtre de la Sagesse finirait donc par les prendre tous en pitié et passerait son chemin.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Nihilism

I just saw Reanimator for the first time tonight and Dear Jesus, I gotta say that cat scene was pure genius, on every level possible. I'm probably the only person around here who hadn't seen it and I won't tell you to go rent it so we can have a nice chat on the different levels. What I will say is I've had a roommate who owned a cat that had a very bad character. And this cat had decided to sleep in my bed on our very first night of collocation. Not only had it decided to sleep in my bed without any regard to my opinion on the subject, but it refused me access to my room. Every time I'd go in my room it would very violently scream at me. So I hit it with a broom. That cat never came back in my room. It actually never stayed in any room I was in.
Reanimator man. There's more than cat scenes though. You should go rent it, so we can discuss it next time.

My first real bicycle had 44 teeth on the front sprocket, and 14 on the back wheel cog.
It had tires that were 28mm wide and a nightmare to put on, but they lasted me for more than 2 years. Of course they were very hard and I fell about 4 times because of wet surfaces, but overall, they were a fun ride. The train drive was not aligned and the chain kept falling off, a most unpleasant ordeal for someone having to commute through about 20km every day. The last time the chain came off the back wheel hub threading was completely destroyed by the cog that went sliding on the side and ripping off all the aluminium on it's way. The chain fell on the inside of the wheel so it locked it solid. I never managed to skid properly, what with my long awkward legs, but that day I skidded on about 3 meters and it did smell of burnt rubber. So I walked. I love walking. But there's nothing sadder then walking with a broken bike on your side, and having to look at other bikes pass you by. Except maybe children soldiers. But even they get to play with guns, while I'm stuck with a fucked up bike.

My second real bicycle has 46 teeth on the front sprocket and 16 on the cog, making for a ratio of 2.875, which is far lesser than 3,1428571428571428571428571428571 (44/14)

44/14 is perfect for racing on a relatively flat terrain. Hills are easy for the legs, but it's too hard on the aluminium, unless your chain tension is perfect, and even then. One day I'll have a titanium sprocket.


titanium sprocket

Friday, September 11, 2009

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Nasal Hair

Remember this guy?



or this one?


Why the fuck do guys have to deal with nasal hair and not girls?
Why did dear old Mother Nature decide that males needed nasal hair?
We don't need them! They're absolutely useless! All they do is keep your boogers from coming out proper, and they said boogers just dry up and it's fucking disgusting.
Don't female have boogers too? Don't they need nasal hair to keep their boogers as well? what the fuck is this about!?

Friday, September 4, 2009

we forgot to celebrate the blog's 3rd birthday

August 16th came and went without any celebration. Here's my redemption, laden with cakes and genitalia. Oh yeah, and some ghetto girls. Yay.







Wednesday, September 2, 2009