Monday, September 29, 2008

Two things:

1) fuck you candyman for finding a link to these videos. Now I can't stop.

2) If you can watch this and not laugh you're not human:


www.Tu.tv

Just putting this out there.



Although I think that if you drink everytime a candidate utters a platitude we're not going to be standing for very long.

Oh, as a special bonus:



which leads to

T-Shirts



Where's the best place to get a novelty t-shirt made?

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Friday, September 26, 2008

More from our favorite Guv'ner



Sarah Palin showcasing her black and white reasoning and fuzzy logic. Seeing her interviews reminds me of high school oral presentations.

For my Brothers in the Slammer

Which one is "better"?





Oh, and if ya want, there is a Critical Masshole today. 17h30 @ Philips Square. I don't think Terrence will be there.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

And then I saw this...

My inner child almost died today.

The only thing that kept it alive was my imaginary monkey friend. But man, was it a close one.



I went to the "Adult Swim" website to watch some Metalocolypse videos when they hit me with a video ad. It was an ad for the US Navy about doing your duty and fighting the fight, complete with slow-motion macho scenes and shots of grunts with their faces painted. The thing is, it was narrated by the voice of Optimus Prime.



This was just too much for me. Optimus Prime!!! The voice of reason and all that is good!!! Then I got to thinking about the Michael Bay movie which was basically an ad for the military and for GM. Then I got to thinking about how many people I know that are lawyers, and... *sniff* *sniff* well... you get the point.

Shhh.

Did you guys know its Napoleon Bonerpants' birthday this Saturday?

I propose we thow him a surprise party.

Well, by party I mean we surprise him at someone's place and then watch Benny Hill.



They call it a mega set, but I see nary a single girl on the cover.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Monday, September 22, 2008

Bad News! (for those who don't like my posts)

I've miraculously found the energy to re-do my evaporated post.

Rejoice!

As the previous post mentioned, I've got something to say about fixed-gear bicycles. Or, as can be stated otherwise, I've got something to share about riding a single-speed direct-drive bicycle: I'm slowly starting to master the skid.

Now, I'm not yet at the point where I can do a block long skid as Needles praises me. Nor am I at this point:



Nor do I especially want to. I think I would only do such a ''move'' in a secluded area, with some friends I detested.

But why are you doing this you hipster wanker? Candyman might ask.

To which I would reply:(Methinks the lady doth protest too much) for fun, geez. Can you imagine the qrazy slides I'll be able to make in winter? Woop! Woop!

Bad News! (for those who've had enough of

WTF! I remember making a complete post! This is complete bullshit. What the hell happenned?!?! It was the best post EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Just kidding. It was lukewarm at best, with a friendly potshot at Candyman.

It was also about fixed gear bicycles ''moves''.

Oh well.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Geekiest post ever.....

Dear Nerdlord,

If the Constructocons and Devastator are so strong, why is it that they keep getting their asses kicked by Omega Supreme?



PS: Hang-over Sundays sometimes lead to watching WAY too many Transformers episodes.

I love Sarah Palin





Check this website of other Sarah lovers

For those of you with a vagina.

and those of you who always wanted one:

Here you go

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Well, I just watched 10 minutes of Man vs Wild

I just watched the guy pull a sheep out of a bog, cut off its legs, skin it partially, decapitate it, make a sleeping bag of its skin, eat a heart and then do a bunch of weird shit.

since i couldn't find a video of this i'm just going to post a random video instead. Don't watch this when you're eating.



EDIT: NOW WITH CAMEL

Tiens, calice du tabernacle! et pan dans ta gueule, Stephen.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Ian Hibell R.I.P.


January–March 1934-23 August 2008
401 428km or so.



From an Economist obit

Ian Hibell went so far in one direction that his eyebrows crusted with frost and his hands froze; and so far in another that he lay down in the hot sand to die of dehydration (as he expected) under a thorn tree; and so far in another that the safest place to be, out of range of the mosquitoes, was to burrow like an alligator into black, viscous mud.

In the course of his 40-year travelling life he went the equivalent of ten times round the equator, covering 6,000 miles or so a year. He became the first man to cycle the Darien Gap in Panama, and the first to cycle from the top to the bottom of the American continent. He went from Norway to the Cape of Good Hope and from Bangkok to Vladivostok, wheeling or walking every inch of the way.



In his book, “Into the Remote Places” (1984), he described his bike as a companion, a crutch and a friend. Setting off in the morning light with “the quiet hum of the wheels, the creak of strap against load, the clink of something in the pannier”, was “delicious”. And more than that. Mr Hibell was a short, sinewy man, not particularly swift on his feet. But on a good smooth downhill run, the wind in his face, the landscape pelting past, he felt “oneness with everything”, like “a god almost”.

In a career of hazards, from soldier ants to real soldiers to sleet that cut his face like steel, only motorists did him real damage. The drivers came too close, and passengers sometimes pelted him with bottles (in Nigeria), or with shovelfuls of gravel (in Brazil). In China in 2006 a van drove over his arm and hand. He recovered, but wondered whether his luck would last. It ran out on the road between Salonika and Athens this August, where he was knocked out of the way by a car that appeared to be chasing another.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Good Exhibit



I just went to see a pretty good art exhibit at the leonard & bina ellen art gallery. It's the gallery in the Library building at Concordia. Some of it was just ok, but there's some really good shit there. Where else can you see a man get beaten to death, I ask you?

"Signals in the Dark: Art in the Shadow of War is an interdisciplinary project investigating the interstices between perpetual war, dominant politics, and visual culture."

Check it out...

Video of the Day

No money, no Motörhead

My study loan was cut down from 12000.00 to 9000.00 because apparently I earned too much in the last 9 months. Thats right, the fucktards at ministère think that earning 17000.00 brut in 9 months, which is about 11000 after impôt, is too much for a decent loan. Now I got 8 months to live with 9000.00$, remove 2400.00 for my tuition and that leaves me with 825.00$ per month. Make that 815.00$ per month after I've repaid Pif and Iggy. Lucky yous, you wont be seeing me until may.

Choke on this

I want to see this when it comes out.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Bad news from the markets today.



it seems homoeroticism is at the root of it all as I had predicted before. it is strictly verboten now to suck on dave's testicles.

Just finished a new painting...

It's called "Das ist des Jägers Ehrenschild". Look it up, enjoy.


Tat2zzzz!



Of all the songs in the world, I must say it ranks pretty high on my list of ''never thought someone would get this song tattooed on their knuckles.''

knuckletattoos.com

Friday, September 12, 2008

The real J Peterman


Look at him, basking in the glory handed to him by a fictional character, the fiend.

I Can't Forget J Peterman

You know why? I'll tell you why. Well for one, he was an incredible character on Seinfeld. But the reason I'll remember more than simply for that is that I name dropped him in an interview. Yes, I mentionned J Peterman in an interview. And yes, it was for a catalogue, an online catalogue. And no, the interviewers did not get it.


I could not find any decent J Peterman pics, other than the one already used by that rabid and ravenous blogpig pic-eater know as CANDYMAN! Instead, I shall post this:




1 free beer to anyone who can explain why I chose it. Deadline is Sunday evening.

How could anyone forget J Peterman?




What a dreamboat!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

what the fuck? i was using this blog as an autobiographical reference. better not be fucked forever. i think the ass hemorrhoids got us kicked off.

ok. Who broke the blog? Come on, say it. I wont kill you. I promise.

This makes as much sense as the movie 'Zeitgeist'

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I I'm Losing my Mind Think

I cannot,

for the life of me, manage to



translate ''glow in the dark'' to French



I'm embarrassed. Please help. Bioluminescence doesn't cut it for me.

FREE BEER!!!!



Here's an interesting concept: FREE BEER.

now, here's an even more interesting concept: FREE BEER, EVERY WEEK!

Well, it's happening at Green Room every thursday night when they give away a whole keg. You walk in, you ask for your free beer, you get it (it's still nice to tip, c'mon), you drink it, you go back to the bar, ask for another one, etc. until the keg runs out...

EVERY FUCKING THURSDAY NIGHT!!!! and the music is provided to you by none other than Jon Cummings (Punkosaurus Rex from the Mirror and lead singer of Bionic, the loudest band in montreal) who's a walking encyclopedia of rock!!!

Support Green Room, you'll be sorry when it's gone...




PS: what's with the medical grossness?

this girl i know got gonorrhea of the eye

rather: How did Descartes die?

a) was run over by a train.

b) was eviscerated by time travelling extra-terrestrials.

c) was killed by the Scandinavian winter.

d) brain tumor from thinking too much

Where did they go?!?



Remember when this blog wasn't some geeky boys club!? Remember when women used to visit!?! Where did they go? This blog is starting to smell too much like ball-sweat and not enough like the inside of my mama's purse.

WHHHAAAA???

"Today’s success puts a tick next to the first of those steps, and over the next few weeks, as the LHC’s operators gain experience and confidence with the new machine, the machine’s acceleration systems will be brought into play, and the beams will be brought into collision to allow the research programme to begin."

What a fucking joke! They didnt even have no fucking collision! They just had one beam running!
We still have to wait for total invagination! And they're not even saying how long!

Thats it. I never want to hear about this bullshit ever again.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

erutuf eht morf ma I

!seithgie eht eviler ot yaw ym no m'I esuac' ,yako sti ,t'nod uoy fi hguohT .noitaredisnoc otni egassem siht ekat esaelP .desrever saw emit ,revewoH .detaerc saw telegnarts ro eloh kcalb tnaig on smees tI .)8002-90-11( CHL eht ffo tes yeht retfa yad eno morf siht gnitirw ma I ,ydobyreve olleH

Don Lafontaine R.I.P.



Phew, I'm glad I bailed out of all my Hollywood stocks.

Hemorrhoids...

(noun)
The lasting result of the Devil fucking you up the ass while you sleep. They suck.

I like this one...

Pretty freaky



That was so metal

Monday, September 8, 2008

what up with dat?

who's goin?
I'd like to.
What about the lift?
isnt it this weekend?



oh... right. There's no point because its after the 10th right? hmmm... I'm sorry, I forgot.


p.s I enjoy the fact that Mediocrity Nazis can still hate the Jews. Not because of their intrinsic evil nature, but because most of them are so successful. I like dat.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

and now for something more appropriate.

See more Jon Lajoie videos at Funny or Die

I cant think of anything more frustrating than being barred from playing street fighter in an arcade. Really. I cant.

about sf4

the arcade was closed.
We drove back home safely.
At least I did.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Who Is KK Downey?



Kidnapper Films is a Montreal film collective and you've seen most of them arround town for sure. You've definetely seen Co-star/Co-writer Matt Sliver, as he used to host the Dance! Dance! Dance! parties at Green Room for over 3 years.

The movie has been acclaimed at many festivals all over the US and here at Fantasia, They've even got an amazing review from Variety. All this for a movie that was essentially self-financed (they didn't go to the usual canadian film financing agencies), and a canadian movie that really has nothing to do with traditional canadian cinema...

I've heard nothing but great things from a bunch of people who could make it at the fantasia screening and now, the KK team is starting the toughest part of the game: sale & promotion. They're taking the movie on the road, starting here, in Montreal at AMC Forum where it'll be playing for the whole week, 4 times a day, starting tomorrow at 3pm. They need to get good numbers at the box-office to either keep it there for another week, or eventually score a distribution deal... yes, right now, they're taking care of their own distribution, if you can imagine!

So tell everyone you know about it!!!!

facebook: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=31366446317

Beijing 2008

You guys ready for the boycott?

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

On a serious note.

Ok, so I've finally found a form of politics that I not only believe in, but that is actually effective.

I've always hated petitions. Rather, I've always hated the people who stop me on the street to sign petitions. This is because for the most part, they are unrealistic or absurd. What the fuck do I care that puppies are going hungry in Peru!?! Fuck em'! Puppies are all cute until you have to start picking up their shit. And if they don't eat, they don't shit...

But I digress...Anyways, about 6 months ago I signed a petition through AVAAZ.org. I did it because I thought the issue was pertinent and I wanted to see how effective an online organization dedicated to taking action could be. It was the only petition I had ever signed that ever made a difference, until I started signing more with them. These guys are actually making huge headway in terms of social change and global unity (sorry it sounds so cheesy). I know some of you already know the site, but if you don't, I suggest you check it out.




Check out their campaigns page

Tadada! Li Calzio Majoretti...



Still nothing

Okay, so I figured I would do a balanced research and find any references to cancha. Thus far, I've only found Spanish or Portuguese references where cancha means field among other things. Though I didn't look very hard and should go to sleep. I'm willing to concede that many locally used expressions may not be easily found on the net. Though it seems in all probability that the word cancha may often be used in Italy...by Hispanic tourists at a calcio game.

So long story short, here's a fucked up video I found while wasting my time on this. Good night.

- NB

Sorry Dildo

Here is a little bit of education for everyone. Dr. Cocktopus told me about this little bit of historical interest.



This is partly where soccer comes from. Its safe to assume that every sport we play today is a fruity version of organized medieval brawls. And to think that it was mainly played by rich aristocrats before it was banned only to be revived in the 1930s. If rich boys played this game, what did the prisoners play? Whatever it was, it surely involved a meat hook or a craw of some sort.

Here is another video for good measure. And yes, the soundtrack is questionable. This sport must be obscure 'cause its hard to find decent footage of it.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Ok...whose in?




Oh yeah...and I'm back.

Dear Dildo-the-proof-maniac


Is this enough?



Please let me know if this is sufficient, otherwise I'll write an email to the Accademia della Crusca.

Exciting new eros from another galaxy!



Its probably a bad idea but lets post geek porn.
Lets get that blog counter goin'.