Saturday, June 30, 2007

Is it just me?

Is it just me or does the giant bagel actually have fear in its eyes? Cassinova, "no" doesn't mean "yes".. even when it comes to bagels.

New name

I got sick of being the joker. You can call me Candyman from now on.

Condom "anti-feu" pour fourrer des grosses torches

This picture was taken shortly after the crew of the U.N.'s moral boosting project packed up and left sri-lanka never to return. The field leader of this disastrous operation believed in recounting humorous stories to the sri-lankese so they would forget about their inhumane conditions. The project was a total failure and then field chief of staff col. Sysyphus was banned from the U.N. and the civilised world after having been charged with inflicting extreme mental prejudice to the unsuspecting masses.

Friday, June 29, 2007


Well since nobody seems to be doing anything with the blog, I think I'll appropriate it for myself. Time for some creative writing.

I woke up this morning and a dog jumped out of my dong. Nothing new there as it happens every morning. The dog was covered in sparkles, which is par for the course as the dog does so once a week. What was weird is that I sneezed and all the sparkles went into my mouth and/or up my nose. Its like I reversed sneezed. All day, I've been reverse sneezing and now I have a paperclip stuck up there.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

I Want

A new name!

Can't choose between these guys:

Bodo Kochari
Jick Magger
Amresh Puri

Oh, won't you please help me choose one?

For Those Who Weren't There

BridgeBurner, Or as I like to call it "Secret Dance Party II : Other Side of the Tracks"

These people are obviously trying to be cool. I just like to state my intentions right off the bat. Why try too hard, when you can try harder than too hard!


New Game!


I had a great idea for a game this week. Its called wingknife. Basically, you blindfold one (1) eye. And someone tosses a knife at you. Its sort of like Vibrations meets a less dangerous Russian Roulette.

And you know who likes to play it? People like this :

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Save Green Room/Main Hall!!!

An asshole moved in right behind the green room/mainhall building just a few weeks ago, and has been complaining to the police and the city about the noise ever since... if you go to green room now, you'll notice that they had to install a new fire exit at the back to reduce the noise, which in itself isn't bad and was actually needed for a long time... but the guy has kept complaining about the noise!
Now, noise complaints are not to be taken lightly and everyone should be able to feel comfortable at home and not having to worry about whether or not they'll be able to sleep, but i remember walking in the alleyway behind green room quite a few times BEFORE they installed this new fire exit and i can't really say that the noise was an issue. it's also worth mentioning that the place has been open for 3 years and never had any significant noise-related problems...
I haven't witnessed this personally, but i've also been told by a very reliable source that the guy has been seen in his backyard trying to hear the noise last weekend.
In any case, this guy has made it his personnal cruisade to put green room/main hall out of commission and has somewhat succeeded, because both venues have had to cancel all their live shows until friday!!! at which point apparently, they'll try to settle something or whatever, i don't know the details.
So, if this thing isn't resolved soon, i've heard that there may be some actions that may be taken to save these venues... we're talking about benefit concerts, petitions, etc.
i just thought i'd give you guys a head's up cause i think it's a place worth saving and assholes like these may very well like to brag about their hot shot condos but they need to understand that the reason why they paid so much about it is in part because it's in an exciting neighborhood and if they wanted to put the places that have shaped this neighborhood out of business, they could have bought an exciting loft in boucherville...

message d'intéret général

this is not directed at any of you in particular, nor would i assume that you'd do something like this either, i just sorta need to vent and if other people happen to read this and it enlightens them, then i'll have succeeded.

when you go to a bar and you bring your own booze and get caught, or if you get into a fight and get kicked out, or if you go behind the bar to steal booze and the bartender sees you, or if you get caught snorting coke in the washrooms... DON'T SAY THAT YOU KNOW THE DJ'S OR ANYONE ELSE ON THE STAFF!!!!! THIS DOESN'T GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO BREAK THE RULES!!! it seems that every week someone gets caught doing something stupid and feel the need to call for our help...

the reason why i said that it wasn't directed at any of you in particular is that all the time this has happened, the people who said they were our friends were usually no more than acquaintances...

my friends got my back, but i'd much rather pay you a beer if you're broke than see you bring your own booze and getting banned from the place i work at... that's all.

Monday, June 25, 2007



Sunday, June 24, 2007

Pic from da partay

I don't get it either!


I've seen the future and it ain't pretty.

I love YouTube!

Does anybody else remember this?


Saturday, June 23, 2007

Hey gang,

I was not present at the 19 Bernard closing ceremony but I am anxiously awaiting your posts.

And I really do mean 'anxiously', I hyperventilated for the first time this week, pretty scary stuff!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Efiooseekay Me

Woo is me. If I ever needed proof that I am my own worse ennemy, I have it now.

Following my computer mishaps, I decided to hightail it to the computer lab at school to get some work done. You can imagine my jumping-jack-like HAPPY reaction when I realized I had forgotten the one document I really needed. There goes an hour I did not have to waste.

I don't want to break shit now. I want to break myself.

Boy, that plastic bag over there would sure look good with my head in it


You know, computers can be pretty good to have around. When they work properly, its a pleasure to use them. So practical.

But when they don't work properly I want to #@(*$&Y(#*&$RJN)(*#U)(*()*@#YU$(*@YU#(*YU@#(*U@()#*U THEM UP!

now is a time like that.

I WANT TO BREAK SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Ok guys, big party tomorrow. Let's all try to be nice little children, like these two here. The appartment's being rented out after our departure, so I want to remain in its current condition.

another fine example that the cops can be cool...

after a fine night of partying at tokyo last night, we were a bunch of people looking for something other than going to bed to do... so our irish friends shane and gary invited us over... again. We had already been there after korova last sunday, at which point we had made fun of their handicapped midget of a barbecue that's missing a leg and that uses a brick as a wooden leg. as you may or may not know, the brick leg is the poor man's wooden leg. at least in ireland it is... so we thought we'd use jimmy this time... jimmy's the barbecue's name and jimmy's got a grill. so don't mess with jimmy.
so the irishmen fetched us some wood (ie: ikea bookshelves) to burn... and burn the wood did! we had a fun little fire going on until gary though it would be a good idea to put in all the wood at the same time (and that sweedish wood burns well... scandinavians are fond of fire)... the tiny fire rose to a blaze from hell and we soon witnessed flames as high as a meter and a half... meanwhile, 3 police cars drove by. 3!!!!! none stopped. then the fire died a little and i turn around and what do i see? a fire engine rushing down st-urbain in our direction. the fire engine slows down and parks right next to the house, followed by a cops car. one firefighter gets out of the truck, walking slowly towards us, zipping up his coat, we're all sitting there, drinking and smoking, he stops in front of us, doesn't say anything with this sort of look "but i was sleeping at the station, guys..." so i get up cause no one else does and i put the lid on jimmy and i look at the firefighter and say "that'll do it..." and he looks at me and smiles and says "yes".
meanwhile the cops get out of their car, flashlights, gloves, blablabla "who's responsible here?" (in french)... gary, who lives there, but has moved from ireland just a few months ago, doesn't speak french and has leanred in his country that to avoid trouble, you don't talk to the cops. so he's like "i don't live here"... i see trouble ahead, so i tell the firefighter that i'm gonna get some water and put that fire out faster. so i go back in and just as i'm walking down to the corridor, i bump into shane who's all excited "I FOUND MORE IKEA WOOD FOR THE FIRE!!!" and i'm like "dude, the cops and the firefighters are there... go tell gary to be nice" and he's like "the firefighters???" so i fill up a 2 liter bottle of coke with water and empty it on jimmy, the fire dies, the firefighter's like "well, ok..." and finally, heidy had managed to explain to the cops that gary didn't speak a word of french and that he wasn't from here, blablabla and got gary to give them his card, so the cops were like "next time we're here it's a fine that you'll get..."
so, they were assholes, but they only warned us, which is good... and the firefighters are so cool! while the cops were like "these damn kids with their drugs and loud parties!!!" the firefighter was like "oooh kids... them and their drugs and parties!"... well, i know it's pretty much the same, but it's a matter of how you say it.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

no more berlin...

i just wanted to mention that we don't hang out at berlin anymore now that dave doesn't work there... jmo suggested that you should take this as a compliment and i guess that i agree...
dave, i don't tell you often, but you,re one of my favorite people.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

And now for a little manlyness.

Interviewer: Do you hate Rocky?
Clubber Lang: No, I don't hate Balboa. I pity the fool, and I will destroy any man who tries to take what I got!
Interviewer: What's your prediction for the fight?
Clubber Lang: My prediction?
Interviewer: Yes, your prediction.
[Clubber looks into camera]
Clubber Lang: Pain! I'm gonna torture him. I'm gonna crucify him. Real bad.
I'm the baddest man in the world.
Rocky Balboa: You don't look so bad to me.
Clubber Lang: What did you say, Paper Champion? I'll beat you like a dog, a dog, you fool!
Clubber Lang: [Calling to Adrian; Smooth talks] Hey, Woman. Hey, Woman! Listen here. Since your old man ain't got no heart, maybe you like to see a real man. I bet you stay up late every night dreamin' you had a real man, don't ya? I'll tell you what. Bring your pretty little self over to my apartment tonight, and I'll show you a real man.
Hey fool! You ready for another beating? You shoulda never came back!

Evil Animal Pic Of The Week

So what's the deal with LaserBeam-Eye Dogs?

Monday, June 18, 2007

I-pod battle

Heidy and I will be competing in the I-pod battle at picnic electronik next saturday... i don't know who are the other teams yet, and i don't know about guestlists either, but it'll be 5$ before 15h and then 7$....

i should also add that this edition of picnics will be awesome because of the non-ipod battle guests: LE TIGRE, FRIGID, CHERRY COLA, NU RAVERS...

we will need a cheering section!

I am not a "cat person"....

But how hilarious, and by hilarious I mean FAT, is this cat?

Cute Animal Pic o' The Week

Why am I such a sucker for this stuff?

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Oh, And Another Thing

So I was washing the dishes at the cottage. Stop.

Why must I always start my posts with "so"? You might not have noticed, but I really do; I usually end up erasing it when I reread myself. I digress.

I looked outside and saw a hummingbird drinking some sweet nectar. It got me thinking about what humans are really doing when they maintain bird feeders.

Bird: |little bird voice| "Why do you give me so much free food?"
You: |dirty old man voice| "So I can look at you."


Or as The Joker put it:

"Its like throwing 5 bucks at a little girl so you can watch her pick it up."

Bikeventure Up Your Ass!

Yes, just like Metal and 88 Fingers, Bikeventure is going there.

Don't say you weren't warned.

Lets hope this party doesn't get outta hand

Friday, June 15, 2007

la St-Han!!!

party de st-jean au korova dimanche le 24 juin!!! BANG!!!!

Crazy Japs!

I still don't get why these guys lost the Second World War.

Guys, come on.

I need to be entertained here.

What happened to the 19?

I know it's nice outside but still.


Oh man!

The Frenchman has no defence agaisnt a strong Russian attack! Or defence, just ask Napoleon.

Thursday, June 14, 2007


It seems that I just can't stop stuffing my face these days.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

DJ Never Forget (FOTP) - Down and Out at The Rooftop Hang

Here's something for those who missed Finger on the Pulse while they were in town... DJ Never Forget (one half of the duo)made this mix that should be available on iTunes shortly... artwork by yours truly.

you can listen to it and download it here:

here's the track listing:

Intro | Terry Diabolik
Beeper (Shake It Down) | Sinden & Count Of Monte Cristal / Blaqstarr
The Party feat. Uffie (LA Riots Remix) | Justice (EXCLUSIVE)
Ce Jeu (them jeans edit) | Yelle
Thou Shalt Always Kill | Dan Le Sac Vs. Scroobius Pip
patrick122 | Mr. Oizo
Yea Yeah (Flosstradamus Remix Final) | Matt & Kim
D.A.N.C.E (mstrkrft Remix) | Justice
Hearts On Fire | Cut Copy
Sea Lion (Chromeo Remix) | Feist
Running Up that Hill (Vocal Club Mix) | Prax Paris
New York (Teenager South of Houston Mix) | Eskimo Joe
Thunderous Bumps (Back from Japan Edit) | Spank Rock + Justice/Thunderous Olympians Remix
Pogo | Digitalism
Pro Nails | Kid Sister feat. Kanye West

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Cut the Crap!!!

It's cool... i know you hate me! i know you can't stand my promo and talk behind my back, tell each other how much i've killed this fine fine blog with all my flyers and invitations to parties... well... i coulodn't care less.
and here's some more cause i believe that there was once a dream that no one dared to whisper for fear of seeing it vanish, vaporize because it was so fragile... this dream was the 19 (dear god!!) and i digress...

so here... i'm a busy man... or at least i try to let people believe that i am...

tonight! check out the weekly honky tonk tuesdays at green room... it took me 6 months to go and when i finally went i had a blast... there's not that many people but it's a really good vibe! on the one time that i was there, Jean Leloup was there and i was sorry to hear that after i left at 2:30, he stayed there until 6 am playing guitar and singing to about 10 people that stayed... he said he'd be back but none of this would ever be advertized so you gotta take your chances... all in all, it's a very fun night...

thursday night, as you all know, heidy and i will be at sky club for the F*ckstar thursdays party... we're on from 10pm to midnight, so if you come please come early!!! if you can't make it, please tell everyone you know to come!!! free before 11pm, 3$ drinks all night!!!

friday night, i'll be dj'ing for the opening of boutique finn (5392a st-laurent - former denis gagnon right by green room) from 20h until 11ish... free booze+food... then, as usual, heidy's at green room all night...

and then, the usual weekends never end with heidy and i at korova... ask ram what he thinks of the night... those of you who only came at the beginning would be surprised!

now that you've read all this, here's another little gift... i know these songs are alittle old (except for freelance hellraiser), but hey.. they're good...

1- Datarock - Fa Fa Fa
2- Digitalism - Pogo
3- The Freelance Hellraiser - Pound for Pound

here's the link:

19 bernard - june 12

as usual, you have 7 days to download the file...

Monday, June 11, 2007



Sunday, June 10, 2007

Bush Attacked!

Have I ever told you that I'm stupid? And that some of my friends are
even stupider? No? Well, I'm stupid and some of my friends are even
stupider. Take last night for example. I was enjoying a few beers on
my balcony, aka the sidewalk in front of the 19. Then things, slowly
started degenerating. Then Shipwreck decided that the dead bush
between the 19 and the 17 would be better off underneath a parked car than its normal place. !?! He proceeded
to start shoving it under the car. There was dirt and mud (it had
rained) When he realized that it would take more strength, he lied
down on the ground and started pushing with both his legs. That's
when the cops showed up.

They started questioning Shipwreck and Grandes-Mains. He did not like
their attitude and complained about abuse of power. The cops replied
by asking him if he really wanted them to abuse their power. Shipwreck, realizing the folly of his was
went into apologetic mode and started to put the bush back in its
rightful spot. He was on all fours shovelling the dirt on the
sidewalk with his arms to put the dirt back. And using his arms as a
brooml that is when the cops lost it. One of them, the hot blond was
doubled over in her cruiser. Then she started laughing so hard that
she was lying on the passenger seat and the driver's seat. The other
cop looked up and saw my neighbour laughing, she was like "What are
you laughing at?" And she went up to his apartment. He keeps his door
open all the time. She came back down and asked us to be quiet. As
they were leaving, I thanked them for their flexibility. Referring to
Shipwreck they said they'd like to see him be flexible! (in a physical

Later on, we caroused some more on St-Laurent.

Woke up hung-over. Later on, I get a knock on my door. Its my
roommate telling me the girl from the store underneath us is here and
she's pissed. Ooops. Rude awakening. I get dressed in a flash.
She politely explains to me that the current situation is untenable.
I apologize and tell her I'll fix the mess.
What a mess! There was dirt everywhere! You can imagine
my pleasure at being hungover, being responsible for my friend's
excess, sweeping dirt of a sidewalk in the hot, hot sun, sweating.

Thursday, June 7, 2007

''du bon beat quebecois''

Hey, I find this song really distracting.

Monday, June 4, 2007

BBC + Gotase = Glory to Britain?

If you don't know what Gotase is... well what are you doing on the internet?

Sorry About the Overload

Here's the video I took of the Secret Dance Party at the St-Laurent-Rosemon/Van Horne over/underpass.

The lighting is shitty and so is the cameraman, but you still get a certain vibe.


The rain's got you down? Don't fret, here's a video from beautiful, sunny Abidjan, capital of Ivory Coast. A certain Mary-Clear said Abidjan had the nicest beach in the world. Is it true? Who knows, who knows. In the mean time, check this out.

Punks = Yo' Aces

I just reached that special stage in an M.A. The holy shit 2 years feels like 2 weeks phase. With that in mind, I've decided I need to put the pedal to the metal. The only problem with that is that I live in the following equation wonderful city + wonderful friends = endless distractions

That is why I will be living a bit like a hermit. Tonight I'm going to the cottage until Thursday evening. I will be checking my voicemail once a day or so, so don't expect a quick call-back. But no worries my little chickadees, I'll be back for the weekend.


Ram Puniyani aka Jick Magger

And and just so you don't forget the good times while I'm gone...

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Read on craigslist

Hehehe, I was pissing time away on craigslist best of, and came across this jewel:

Ask a silly question

I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Pal at Big W and standing inline at the check out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Pal Diet again although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Pal nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door.

Stupid b*tch...why else would I buy dog food??

From me to you!!!

i won't promote anything... instead i figured i'd give you something... here are a few tracks that i've been into lately... i have no pretension to enter the realm of the cool bloggers who know everything before everyone and i know some of them are somewhat old (at least in terms of internet time!)...

so, here you have it... i put it on yousendit so you'll have 7 days to download it... it's a 55M file so depending on your connection it may take a few minutes to download... enjoy!

here's the tracklist and my latest flyers!

Boom ip - rat tail
Dan le sac - Thou shall always kill
Dragonette - I get around
Justice - D.A.N.C.E. (mstrkrft remix)
Justice - Genesis
Para One - Clubhoppn
Teki Latex - Les Jouets
Yo majesty! - Club action (Chris Bagraiders Sailing to Baltimore edit)

here's the link:

La claque Laurentide!

À remarquer:
- Jean-Paul se stationne vraiment dans le chemin.
- Jean-Paul essaie d'aller quelque part mais il se fait constamment arrêter.
- Jean-Paul est apparemment un gars qui s'implique dans tout, mais il ne dit absolument rien au cours de la publicité.

Friday, June 1, 2007


Qu'est ce qu'un pénis ?


I'll be there. And at 8pm, we can all go to Broadcast radio and watch Trebekie spin like a dervish, a fucking dervish!

You can see the resemblance.