Thursday, November 29, 2007

barforama

Advantage : Shorties





I've come to the awful conclusion that I've got to add another item to the ADVANTAGE SHORTIES COLUMN : They get to hang their long sleeve shirts or jackets aloofly on a chair.

Whereas tall people such as myself are constantly having their long sleeves drag agaisnt the ground because chairs are not high enough.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Just stop it!



Stop picking on Napoleon for his taste in women. He's just attracted to power, that's all.

PS: I found this photo under his mattress.

Spring Is Not Here!

I repeat, Spring is NOT here!

Sorry guys, I was a bit premature in my spring time celebration. Oooops.

I hope this will make things better:



I stole this winter fantasy from Bonerpants' last dream last night. What a nerd.

Nerd or not, you have to admit the man has good taste in women.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Spring Is Here!

Hey guys,

Have you noticed how its been getting warmer these days? Did you notice how today we got rain and not snow? WINTER IS OVER! SPRING HAS SPRUNG! Ahhhhhhh...



That was, like, the shortest winter ever! Sweet!

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Speaking of records...



WHEN THE FUCK ARE WE GONNA GET FLYING CARS!?!?!?!?! I remember when I was a kid, the visions people had of the future. We were supposed to have colonized the moon by now. AND BE DRIVING FLYING CARS!! And be eating pills instead of having to cook these ridiculously lavish meals we keep preparing. Why is there still war, and why isn't it interstellar? No, that's too far. Why isn't it interplanetary? Why am I not part robot!?

Tuesday, November 20, 2007









here is choice sample from this website that collects funny album covers. (i have felt the robotic pull just like candyman) my personal favorite is the Brailettes! fantastic.

A name for my pain.


I love computers but this is ridiculous. I just wanted to express my hatred for the temptress known as procrastination. It's almost like the Devil decided "Hey! People don't procrastinate nearly enough! I should put a shiny procrastination machine in every home! And then, I'll connect everyone so that they can procrastinate together and teach each other to do it better!" Bastard Devil!!!

Every time I walk by my computer, I feel like I'm being attacked by robotic temptation. Fantasies of free music, TV shows, Information!!!! INFORMATION!!!!!! I can't escape.


Anyways, I just wanted to apologize for not having any of you guys over lately. My inability to leave my computer screen has left my apartment looking like this:



At least I still have my pride. No... wait... no... I got nothin'

NEWS FLASH! Canada Under the Gun

"Depuis quelques mois, les médias algériens s'acharnent sur la pomme de terre canadienne."



hehehe.

Depuis quelques mois, les médias algériens s'acharnent sur la pomme de terre canadienne. Aux prises avec une pénurie, l'Algérie a reçu du Canada près de 100 000 tonnes de pommes de terre depuis l'été dernier. Des dizaines de milliers de tonnes ne répondaient pas aux normes de qualité du pays.


RadCan Story

the front fell off

Monday, November 19, 2007

Boobies

Sometimes six just isn't enough.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Spider becomes Napoleon Bonerpants

That was my nickname this summer when I was working in the woods. I might as well honor it on this blog. I hesitated for a while because I wanted to make an illustration of Napoleon with, well, boner pants. I never took the time so I ended up googling "Napoleon Bonerpants" and found out that there is a band with that name. It seems like the kind of band that would make T-shirts before making any music (like Flesh) or who come out with a Best of right after releasing their demo. Ironically enough, I gave up and got Napoleon's picture off Wikipedia only to realize that he really had boner pants! Problem solved!

Friday, November 16, 2007

5 minutes break

Now now children, settle down.
We've learned in our last session a little more about not so young socially misadapted men with anger issues, now lets take a 5 minute break and enjoy the music of Mr. Wesley Willis, who will interpret for us one of his finer success : Suck a donkey's smelley ass, accompanied by the garbage pail kids. Enjoy, and remember, keep that saliva inside your mouth.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Metal 101 Session 2

For the first part of this class, we will go to Finland. No, not Children of Bodom. I love this band but I've kind of given up on sharing my interest. I last went to see them alone at Metropolis and I'm sure I was one of the only guys over twenty. It made for good moshpit supremacy, though. This time, I will present a band that just might be a good gateway into metal or perhaps even a gateway out of metal for those who discriminate too much. They're labeled "progressive folk/electronic melodeth" or something like that but I call it radio friendly kick ass music. Its got a positive vibe to it too, especially since their last deadbeat alternacrap singer left. I'm talking about Amorphis. I just can't stop listening to this shit.



Here, now, is a different kind of band that is more on the down side. They’re some sort of atmospheric doomish, blackish (read dark) metal band. I thought they were from some nordland but it turns out they’re from Portland, Oregon. I really don’t get what is up with that place. Anyways, though its better than many other videos out there, this video doesn’t do them justice (as no video has ever done any metal band justice except for “One”) simply because it shows a snipet from an opus that only makes sense if you listen to it from end to end. I would like to mention the emphasis on nature, a theme which many other bands (that have no videos whatsoever) base their entire careers on. Here’s Agalloch.



And now, back to Finland. I know this isn’t helping my cause but…what the hey, its for a good laugh. Here’s some Finntroll.



I always wondered what a video from these guys would be like. I’m not disappointed… though not impressed.

hehe

Amazing Facts

Did you know that this:


The Internet

AND this:


Gore-Tex fabric

Were both invented by the same man ? :



Al Gore.



Did you? Well he did. Yes, not only did he invent this thing that we are sharing this post on, but he also invented the waterproof-breathable material known as Gore-Tex. Amazing! You know, I've long been someone who says that waterproof-breathable fabric is neither waterproof nor breathable. That is only because Gore-Tex is priced beyond my means. Way beyond. Just go to an Arc'Teryx store and you'll see what I mean. That being said, Gore-Tex is the gold standard of waterproof-breathability. One day I will get the chance to test it out.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

My name is Bruce





Did any of you know that its now been a whole month, a WHOLE month people!!!
Its now been a whole month that My name is Bruce, the movie that is closest to be the next evil dead sequel, its been a whole month that the movie directed by Bruce Campbell, starring Bruce Campbell in the role of Bruce Campbell, this movie has been showing in theater across America, for a WHOLE MONTH??!?!!!?


Why have we not heard about this?
What is wrong with our country?
Are we even considered as a country?
What is this? why is this happening? How could it be? I dont understand? I donT Oh OH oh.. WOOOOOHHH... pffff.. pffff... pffff....

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Notre ami Normand


I used to think he was black. I`m still not sure.

And now, for more eroticism

Brought to you by Série Rose.

...and racist.



This is what happens when you grow up listening to CKOI

This guy is not funny

DIEUDONNE - Petit Poney (Clip)


DIEUDONNE - Petit Poney (Clip)
Vidéo envoyée par PAULOM

Monday, November 12, 2007

A MOI BROADWAY!!!


Le divorce de patrick - partie1: hommes et femmes
Vidéo envoyée par b_careful

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Converted!

My girlfriend was never Christian after all!

Say hello to my new gods!

Saturday, November 10, 2007

My last Risk post. (or not)

Its 7:30 and I just got home from spending the whole night playing risk 2210.
Ok. Just to give you a timeframe of the event :

10:30p.m - game one starts.

24:00 a.m - end of the first round of game one

24:35 a.m - Spazz arrival. Game one aborted during round two.

24:45 a.m - start of game two.

04:30 a.m - Neighbour(s?) go psycho, starts hitting walls with such viguor risk players cant even tell where the pummeling is coming from.

05:00 a.m - Silent but deadly war goes on.

06:15 a.m. - end of game two.

Friday, November 9, 2007

Metal 101 Session 1

This is why I didn't have an "absolute fucking blast" at The Police concert:



And if that wasn't cheery enough, check out this little anthem (very cool solo at 4:30):



Corny as hell, I know. But that's power metal for ya. Its a bit more accessible to the casual ear but can still tear your face off.

That's right, like it or not, I am here to share my love for metal, the music that turns full grown men into prepubescent beatlemaniacs. If you watched these two videos in their entirety, you're well on your way to giving a shit.

By the way, the guys in the latter video are pretty much Sting's age.

rocky in 5 seconds...

for some reason, youtube doesn't allow direct post anymore so just copy the link...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mj3xM4mFS9Y&eurl=http://www.thewebshite.net/?p=853

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Spider seeking black widow

So yeah. I've been working pretty hard lately. Its hard enough to eat and exercise properly. But to waste time properly? I haven't done that in ages. So I surfed the tube and found this little gem. Its about copulation, another activity that I'm starting to miss. But just as my sentence in corporate hell comes to an end, the cold will have arrived. And when winter comes, spiders stop mating. Sniff

I'M RICH BITCH!

look at that mail i got! that's it, so long fuckers!!!!

"From:Mr. Patrick K W. Chan.

Good Day ,

I am Mr. Patrick K. W. Chan. Executive Director and Chief Financial
Officer of the Hang Seng Bank Ltd.

Before the U.S and Iraqi war our client Col. Hosam Hassan who was with the
Iraqi forces and also business man made a numbered fixed deposit
for 18 calendar months, with a value of Thirty Million United State
Dollars($30,000,000.00) only in my branch.Upon maturity several notices
was sent to him, even during the war which began in 2003. Again after the
war another notification was sent and still no response came from him.We
later find out that Col. Hosam Hassan along with his wife and only
daughter had been killed during the war in a bomb blast that hit their home.

After further investigation it was also discovered that our client
Col.Hosam Hassan did not declare any next of kin in his officialpapers
including the paper work of his bank deposit.

And he also confided in me the last time he was at my office that no one
except me knew of his deposit in my bank. So, Thirty Million United State
Dollars($30,000,000.00)is still lying in my bank and no one will ever come
forward to claim it.What bothers me most is that according to the laws of
my country at the expiration 5 years the funds will revert to the
ownership of the Hong Kong Government if nobody applies to claim the
funds. Against this backdrop,my suggestion to you is that I will like you
as a foreigner to stand as the next of kin to Col.Hosam Hassan so that
you will be able to receive his funds.

MODALITIES:
I want you to know that I have had everything planned out so that we shall
come out successful. I have an attorney that will prepare the necessary
document that will back you up as the next of kin to Col. Hosam Hassan,all
that is required from you at this stage is for you to provide me with your
Full Names and Address so that the attorney can commence his job.After you
have been made the next of kin, the attorney will also fill in for claims
on your behalf and secure the necessary approval and of probate in your
favour for the move of the funds to an account that will be provided by
you.

There is no risk involved at all in this matter, as we are going to adopt
a legalized method and the attorney will prepare all the necessary
documents. Please endeavor to observe utmost discretion in all matters
concerning this issue.Once the funds have been transferred to your
nominated bank account we shall then share in the ratio of 60% for me, 40%
for
you.Should you be interested please send me your,

1,Full names,
2,Private phone number,
3,Current residential address.

And I will prefer you reach me on my private email address below;

(chanpatrick500k@yahoo.com.hk)

and finally after that I shall provide you with more details of this
operation.Your earliest response to this letter will be appreciated.

Kind Regards,

Mr. Patrick K. W. Chan."

1000!!!




the 1000th post is mine!!! all mine!!!

cheer and sploodge for me!

999

998

997

996

995

994

993

Ouch!


This is someone some of us know.

The good thing about winter is that shit like that doesn't happen.

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

resurrecting RAM PUNYANI

Bikes

Betcha didn't know there were city bike movies around...



Saturday, November 3, 2007

Take this.

This is for all the coconut crab skeptics out there.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coconut_crab







Rubber special effects, my ass.

You wanted erotic, you got it.


Yoko Matsugane Jumping - Funny bloopers are a click away

I somehow think that I was influenced by the previous post.

mister sparkele

Sow the seeds of Total War.



Q1. Who doesnt like to play risk?
A1. Little girls.

Q2. Who doesnt like to play risk 2210 a.d.?
A2. Little girls and hippies who are scared by Machines Of Destruction and nuclear war.


Now that I've removed any trace of ambivalence, lets play risk 2210 a.d.

For those of you who dont know what I'm talking about, take some time to learn more about dominating the earth AND the moon with Rich, Jeff and some other guy at :

http://www.wizards.com/avalonhill/flash/RISKdemo_021210.html

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Where is Eros?


On another most important subject, I would like to ask the readers of this blog to contribute to the changing of the actual virtually non-existing state of internet eroticism by indulging in an Erotic Post XXXtravaganza.

Here is my contribution.

Lemmy and Tim giving the finger to the publishers who passed on the greatest video game that will ever have been made.