What!?!?!?!

Who the hell does Facebook think they are!?!?! They can't just take it away from me like that. I've seen this done before, but usually in drug dealers. Watch this, they're gonna come back and start charging us. The fuckers!!!!!! If I get this message one more time today, I'm gonna lose my shit. Fucking lose it!!!!!! Fuck! Fuckers!!!!!!

guess who?

Oh Shit!

What the fuck is happening to the internet?

Last Night

Here's a few of the tidbits I heard yesterday:

"I like your diction." -Shipwreck trying to be nice to the waitress.

* * *

"Where's your leash?" -Shipwreck to Erizabeth

* * *

"Dude, you just hit a girl. In the face. And she was wearing glasses!" -when Jazzine did just that.

* * *

"Why am I making out with you? I hate you."
-"I hate you too, wanna make out with me?"
-"Can I?"

* * *

"That's the second time tonight I see a man on all fours on St-Laurent." -Candyman

Friendly Warning to All Masturbators

Cuidado! Achtung! Attention!

Some guy in Florida just got 60 days added to his jail sentence, for masturbating in his cell! Holy tug of war Batman, if that was me, I'd get a life sentence.



«David Batty
Thursday July 26, 2007
Guardian Unlimited

It is a verdict likely to cause great consternation to lonely prisoners throughout the US penal system. A prisoner in Florida has been found guilty of indecent exposure for masturbating alone in his cell.

[...]

The case drew sniggers from the courtroom as prospective jurors were questioned about their own masturbatory habits and the only witness was asked whether she had considered calling in a Swat team to tackle the defendant.

[...]

"Did you call a Swat team?"

"I wish I had," the deputy replied.

[...]

Ms McHugh asked the 17 prospective jurors who among them had never masturbated. No hands went up.»

Good call on the lawyer for the framing of that question.


Prisoner found guilty of masturbating in his cell

For Spider

This thing is cheesy as fuck, but I thought I'd post it for the imagery.

glumbert.com - The World's Most Dangerous Road

Tempting God

Do you think the act of posting this has made me more likely to end up disabled?

This dude's fucked.

R.I.P. Brownie aka my bike

My bycicle is dead. Anyone got one for me? Or knows someone who wants to sell? No stolen bikes please.

Umm...

There's crazy, there's stupid, and then there's this guy.

honeymoon

as you may or may not know, heidy canot come down to maine with me next week, so i've chosen to take my other girlfriend there with me: amresh puri aka, ram punyani aka, bod karachi aka, sympathetic backstabber or something...

well, it'll be a sweet week of passionate love-making on the sand, watching him choke to death on seafood and playing scrabble with my grandmother. not to mention the wet t-shirt contest, with which, needless to say, my grandmother has nothing to do...

i thought i'd post some pictures of the magnificent pier area at old orchard, at about a 30 minute walk from where we'll and consequently, our "nightlife" for the week.




and this is a guy that popped up in google search under "old orchard maine"...

i thought i knew what true beauty was...

I WAS WRONG!!!! this is beautiful!

Good God.

glumbert.com - Chicken Fried Bacon

Why Germans love David Hasselhoffenschter...whatever.

glumbert.com - The Hoff Gets Drizzy

dans l'esprit de...

In following the name-changing spirit of late, I have newly been christened as Woody Esplanade. Although this is my stripper name (generate your own with your first Pet's name as the first name and the first street you grew up on as the last name), I will be using it for business purposes as well from this point on. I'll always be a Casanova though.

New Name

Hey Youze Guys!

Bodo Kochari, a tribe in North-East India simply was not cutting it for me. AND Sycophantic Backstabber was burning a hole in my brain. So there you go, inspired by actors around the world, my new nom de guerre is now : SYCOPHANTIC BACKSTABBER

laters

La Vita e Bella.

There are some things in this world that I will never understand. This is one of them. I am disturbed, yet hopeful? My emotions are twisted into a giant baloon knot. The caption for this video reads as follows: "1,500 plus CPDRC inmates of the Cebu Provincial Detention and Rehabilitation Center, Cebu, Philippines do Michael Jackson's Thriller." Keep in mind there are no women in correctional facilities, yet there is a woman in Thriller. Enjoy.

glumbert.com - Prison Thriller

Best music video ever.

You have got to love the Italians (from Italy, because the ones here are a bunch of losers).

Book Review!

Hey The One They Call Ignacio! I know you've been dying to steer your beady little eyes on the newest Potter cash bonanza. But like those two other adult males who read that stuff, you feel a little, hmmm, girly to be reading it in public. Well, our close friends at PWOT have come up with a great idea for you! Book covers!

Here are two I thought you might like:



"Seriously, what is the deal with bitches these days?"

"There's a reason they make 70 cents to every dollar you make, bro; it's because you have a thundercock of ultimate proportion"

Or this one :



"The anal sex sequences, particularly chapters 1, 3-5, 7, 10-16 and 22-30 are described in such graphic, intricate detail, that I literally vomited on my copy of the book" -Ron Dursley, The New York Times


http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/pottercovers.html

PWOT

Movie Review

Transformers = Suck.



Where the fuck was Bruce Campbell?

SF II

For some reason that escapes me, I read an wikipedian article on Street Fighter II. I SOOOOOO feel like playing right now! Oh man, the memories!

HADUKEN!

SHORYUKEN!

TATSUMAKI SENPUUKYAKU!

Pignig Electronig

I went to Piknic électronique last Sunday and I was really cool. Oh, sorry, IT was really cool, although it was basically tams but with «cool» people. No, it wasn't that bad. Most people were normal, simply looking to have fun.

Let's all go. Sunday the 5th of August. Game, set and match! (your calendré)

Last Minute!

Hey guys, sorry about this, but here's a last minute verni


Uh, I'm the one who added «boozart» to the painting. So?

Here's the info 18 juillet 2007
Galerie Thérèse Dion
372 Sainte-Catherine O. suite 527

Decepticons are cool : exhibit A

Here's another proof why the decepticons are part of the elite when it comes to awesomeness. Months before the movie even came out, here's what Barricade made a stupid worthless human from the american political right write on his pityful blog : "According to Left Lane News, this will be the vehicle form of one of the evil Decepticons. In the original series, a police car would never have been the alternate mode of an evil Decepticon, and portraying a police car with the slogan "to punish and enslave" makes me sick. Is this what Steven Spielberg wants us to think of the police force - an oppressive law enforcement agency? Because as every liberal would like you to believe, the police force does nothing but arrest innocent people and parade all over people's rights. You could never get away with putting something like that on the side of a police car immediately after 9/11, but like always the left makes it a point to forget the kind of sacrifices our heroes both abroad and at home make to keep us safe.

The more I read and see about this movie, the more I realize it is a sad day for the Autobot and American cause."


there, you have it.

"Decepticons, DESTROY!!!!"

As to counterweight the 183 bad critiques of The Movie I read, I would like to offer my own to the world and also to bobo kachari. Course this movie has its critical flaws that will cause great prejudice to any real fan of the franchise. ex.: Megatron doesnt wield a bazooka on his arm; Red Alert is named "Ratchet"; Megatron is a plane?!; Starscream has a low guttural voice!?; the decepticons all look the same making it feel like the autobots are only fighting megatron, except for devastator, who's real fucking cool even though he gets discarded a bit too easily by the O.P. but thats ok cause it serves to show how Prime is so fucking powerful, as he should be; the human factor: way too important (although I understand this is a movie but still, cutting down on the crap would have helped it, also Transformers dont need no fucking harmless human made bullets to help them, they're 6 meters tall robots for christ sake. More Decepticon induced gore would have been much appreciated, fuck the PG 13, we're all over 25 by now and since we're still very much interested by all this nonsense about metamorphosing robots, I think the psychological damage has already been done long ago) Course the list of this movies flaws could go on and on, what did you expect from Michael Bay, but none of it really matters cause all of the robots scene are just insane, and thats all that makes this movie worth seeing. I mean I got shivers right at the first scene, when that decepticon blasted through the whole military base. That scene made me a kid again, for about 45 seconds, I didnt know what an orgasm was, I didnt know what working meant, I didnt know what abusive emotional manipulation was, all I knew was that the Decepticons are really fucking cool.

I've Always Liked This Ad

Further Proof

See, I told you smoking was bad for you!

Final Solution

Isn't time we exterminated people like this? You know, they're the same ones who invented Nü Metal and thought they were cool because they listened to Limp Bizkit and broke things.



Oh no, I just realized how old I am. I mentionned Nü Metal AND Limp Bizkit. Woe is me.

Week-End

Considering the events taking place this week-end, I thought it would be a good idea if we wore this sticker. Just to avoid any confusion.




To recap, tonight, there is Lauren's vernissage :
4030 St.Ambroise, studio 224
17h-21h.

Tomorrow, there is Chebaztian's birthday picnic:

Parc Lafontaine
Air des picnics
15h.

New Neighbourhood

Man, I love this place. I've already started making new friends! Look I took a picture of them in Parc Lafontaine. We stayed there 'till 9, playing the craziest jams! lol!



On the left is Alleyne, we call him Leyne for short! And on the right is the beautiful and graceful Aingeal.

Pretentious Lunacy!

I've had it with people pluralizing latin words. You know the type: fungus to fungi, medium to media (or rather the opposite; Yes, I'm looking at you Marshall McLuhan), forum to forii...

The problem is that its not like mouse and mice here. The function of the word determines its suffix. So if you're going to advertise your intellectual insecurities by pluralizing a latin word, you're going to have be consistent and change the suffix each time it changes function. Fungus is fine for a singular subject, but if you're going to use it as a direct complement (or whatever C.O.D. is in English) its fungum, I think. You see, I don't know, because I do not speak latin.


Next time you're confronted by someone insisting you pluralize your latin word, be careful! This person is displaying a sign of pretension bordering on insanity. The pretension comes from their need to show off their knowledge of latin; the insanity comes from the inherent contradiction in their behaviour. By pluralizing the latin word in a so-called latin way, they are both demonstrating their perceived understanding and their factual ignorance of latin rules.

Essentially, they might as well be yelling: "LOOK AT ME! I'M SMART! I KNOW LATIN!" Then proceed to prove the opposite. You could call them liars, but I'll give them the benefit of the doubt and put them in the category of those of who don't know they don't know.

It reminds of that time I was watching a movie with a girl when a cityscape comes up on screen. I go: "Look, its Toronto", moments before Vancouver appears underneath said cityscape.

Or that time I'm in a bar with another girl and while talking about beer I tell her that lagers only come in a blonde colour. The waitress appears almost instantly to tell us about the special on the black lager.

Lesbian Gangs Terrorize USA!

Hard to believe, but then again its Bill O'Reilly were talking about. What's really scary is that he's nothing compared to Glenn Beck on Headlline News, which is a network owned by CNN.

Guide to Ethical Suicide

Hey you! Yeah, you, that guy with the blade against your wrist! Have you thought about what you're doing? No, I'm not talking about that. Your life does totally suck, and I honestly don't have the time, energy or imagination to think of a better solution to your problems.

I'm not here to discourage you from killing yourself. Rather, I want you to ENCOURAGE you to kill yourself ethically. What's that? Well, its a simple process I call 1, 2, 3, SUICIDE!



1. Think of those "close" to you
2. Think of all the innocent people you share the world with.
3. Think of yourself.
SUICIDE!

Just follow that order and we can all be happy, you especially.



Guidelines:

1. Don't choose a date too close to a birthday, anniversary, and/or special event. You're making the ultimate decision, the least you could do is plan ahead.

2. No, don't use a bridge, the métro, a train or any other public property. Especially not at rush hour. You are making everybody's lives that much more frustrating. We are ALL selfish, but c'mon.

3. Pills don't work well. Guns are cool. What does it say about you when you can't even take your own life away? Its the only thing that really belongs to you, and even then you don't know what to do.

Fucking up a suicide and becoming a vegetable in a hospital bed is not a good testament to your person. And its a total bummer on every other living being in this world. That annual 40 000$ that goes to caring for you could have gone to food for starving children, beating cancer, helping the environment and what not.


Your botched suicide is one more dead innocent child and one less living polar bear. You think those two chose to be born?



SUICIDE!

p.s. I was inspired to write this by being reminded of this guy:

Suicidally Incompetent Man Kills 11, Hospitalizes 200

Man Amongst Boys

His manliness was in many ways epitomized by his cool and calm stalking of the homocidal maniac who would murder beautiful girls that rejected him.

BQL Just Got More Practical! Thank You Internet!

A few weeks ago, because of my inability to read I got parking tickets. Snif. No, I'm not a glutton for ticket punishment (unlike some of us). I thought I had found a sweet, legit parking stop, so I left "my" car there. I returned two days later, proud of myself for getting back on time to move the car before I got a ticket. Well, I did not a receive A ticket, rather two (2) tickets. Fuck. I was sure they had made a mistake. A careful rereading of the sign made me realize that I had my head stuck in my bum. Again.

I don't know how I got confused between "Stationnement interdit lundi et vendredi 12h-13h" and "Stationnement interdit lundi à vendredi 8h-9h", but I did. I mean misreading "à" for "et" is forgivable, but "8h-9h" "12h-13h", c'mon! That's not wishful thinking, its downright hallucination!

All this to write to let you know that you can know pay your tickets online via the Ville de Montréal website! Sweet.

Here's the link

Pay tickets online

Goodness

There's something simply magical about nutella on white bread. Just ask me, I had some for breakfast. Very few people are happier than I am right now.

http://www.environmentforbeginners.com/

Pour tous ceux que ça intéresse, je suis en train de construire un site Internet pour s'instruire sur l'environnement. C'est une genre d'encyclopédie qui explique les différents phénomènes reliés à l'environnement et ses conséquences. Vous pouvez y jeter un coup d'oeil, nombreux autres articles devraient apparaître très bientôt.

http://www.environmentforbeginners.com/

Jaymo, peux-tu le mettre en link sur le blog?

Worlda Cupa

Hey guys,

I went to the doubleheader yesterday and it was AMAZING! I can't wait to go back on Friday. 12$ gets you two games. There are tons of people and the crowd is really into it. My section kept on trying to do the wave during the game and when the rest of the crowd did not oblige, they booed. Yes, one part of the crowd booed the other, who then complied : )

After the USA demolished Poland 6-1, The Brazilians barely beat the Koreans 3-2. They were winning 3-zip until 6 minutes were left, then BING-BANG-BOOM! The tighest end ever. This was easily the best footie game I have seen in my life.

Friday we've got the Czech Republic versus Panama at 17h, followed by Poland versus Korea.

See you there!

Disney Life

After such a tear-jerking song, how could the toréador proceed to kill the bull?

F.U.N.

Anybody up for going to la Ronde this summer?



Oh, and has anybody seen my toothbrush?