Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Which leads us to march 22nd.

Dear internet kids,

if you've been listening, you will know that in a few moments our planet's axis will have shifted again.
The consequences of such shift could be of vast amplitude: seasons could be shortened, other seasons could be longered, a pole could be inverted, another pole could also be inverted.
These poles inversions could lead to frightening results. For instance, where would north be found? And if it was found, would it still be north? The answer to this question remains in the realm of speculations.
This realm of speculations, when explored with the right set of investigative inquiry apparatus, can reveal surprising notions. We all know some animals rely on natural geolocalization capacities to find their way through this hostile and cruel world. An example of this would be the Capybara. The Capybara, being the best animal to be found on this planet right now, is the only animal with natural geolocalization capacities extended by supra-natural radar-waves emitting fur. As the capybaras walk in the amazon jungle, their fur vibrates at very high frequencies, creating a sonar pulse that will alter the flight of the neutrinos and send some of them towards the north pole and back again toward the south pole and then back at the capybara source. This radar system serves a purpose that remains deeper in the realm of speculations. Nevertheless, we need not be impressed by the intricacies of mother nature. The only knowledge of the existence of this system should suffice to alarm us to uncontrollable levels. Because if the north pole was to be inverted in the next hours, serious consequences could lead to devastating causes, which, in the history of the amazon, has never brought good to this world. Ask Martin Strel. He knows. Alas, there is absolutely nothing we can do to avoid this axis shift, and the capybaras will be greatly affected by it, even if no one will ever notice.


Barbarosa said...

What doesn't Martin Strel know?

Dementor said...

He doesnt know when to quit.