Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Racism : my new understanding.

Dear 19 Bernard,

After 6 months in Ontario, I have now understood why racism is not a funny thing.
Allow me to explain so you too can attain the wisdom.
Prior to 6 months ago I lived in the Metropole.
In the Metropole, a lot of people of different colours, of different religions and unfortunately of different languages mix, so they can create new races like japanegros, mexichinks or like me, Quebanese.
Or they can retain from spawning interracials and continue breeding pure blooded childs. Whatever they may choose to do, they are forced to live by and accept the presence of the other races because they are all stuck together in the Metropole. In this context, it is understandable that the Metropolitan man who doesnt know the outside world can find a thing like racism laughable. Racism is funny because to him it is attributed to the ignorant retarded xenophobes who are themselves funny by their retarded views, and retarded views are funny because retards are funny (if you deny this, you are of bad faith and you know it)
So racism is funny because its retarded and the retard is hilarious. Case proven. Now take the Metropolitan man out of the Metropole and things begin to go awry for him because he no longer can bath with the other races and embrace the difference. Things are no longer funny if he ends up surrounded by xenophobe retards because these people do not find racism pleasant to laugh at, they find it normal.

Here is an actual conversation that took place earlier today
(the names of the protagonists are changed so I dont get lynched or something)

Story Characters

Jim : a uber macho alpha-redneck from calgary who would have made Heimrich Himmler seem like a fainthearted wuss
Jack : one of the many beta males who bow down to Jim.
Romulus : previously the only negro of the program from which he was cut off earlier. If life was a fiction he would have been cut off because of his race but this is reality and the guy really fucking sucked at diving.
Emir Sarem : our Quebanese hero.

Jack - Now that Romulus has been cut off the program, we no longer have to watch ourselves when hes around.
Jim - Good thing hes not around anymore. I hear he's gonna try to work on the rigs in alberta. A nigger on the rigs : hahahaha!
Jack - ... hahahah...
Jim - There's two rules on the patch : 1- no snatch on the patch, 2- no blacks on the patch.
Jack - hahahaha...
Jim - so we're all whites now. Well... (looks at Emir with nervous smile) There's still frenchie left. hahaha.
Jack - .... ha.
Emir Sarem - its all right, its all right, I know you guys are all fucking racists. I can deal with that.
Jim - its ok, you're white.

The end.

So you see, this episode might seem funny to you urbanites who are still protected by the cosmopolitan walls of our great Metropole. But to me who is stranded in this hatefilled country, the comedy has turned into a tragedy, and I am struggling to refrain from killing, so the tragedy doesnt turn into a horrority.

Anyways, hope you guys have fun laughing at races on friday, I'll be sucking my toes out of anger.

3 comments:

Barbarosa said...

I've always prefered to suck my toes out of sexual frustration. But hey, to each their own, eh?

Well, I guess not considering the conversation that just happened mit our good friend Shipwreck.

In other news, today I refrained from taking a shower as my toes were really clean.

Anonymous said...

yo shipwreck!! scroll down!!! there's a vagine-o-car!!!! fuck racism when you can take all your friends aboard your favorite twat and drive them around town for hours!!! and imagine the possibilities if you get the car drunk!!! my oh my!!

Anonymous said...

émile est triste et frustré et émile ne raconte pas cette histoire qui l'affecte à sa vagine lorsqu'elle l'appelle, émile est négatif, la vagine ne sait pas pourquoi et pense que c'est de sa faute? Elle empire donc la situation.
ahh la communication....c'est beau.