On a lighter note...

The blog has been a little depressing for the past couple of posts so I thought I'd add a nice photo I took while walking along the Lachine Canal.



Ooops, wrong photo. Oh well, next time then.

Hope ? Change ?

Give me a fucking break.

This is for any of you who still think humanity can be saved from itself.


In light of this, I can only quote one famous Decepticon : "Your precious humans are nothing but imposters. Strip them of their core and what have you got? Selfish, scared animals ready for extermination! They're not like us, Prime. They stand for nothing but themselves. Join me and we can exterminate them forever."

And now for something completely different..

I really don't know what to make of this but apparently they really understand wrestling in Japan. Awesome moments are one guy tea bagging one of the chicks and another where a bunch of Japanese permavirgins are encouraging the wrestler on and the very uncomfortable looking woman in the background.

I couldn't embed it and I probably shouldn't anyways for those who read this from work. Pretty much NSFW.

Quebec: pas'd claouwse!

(image not related)

I can't believe I forgot to blog this. The other night, I was watching a canadiens game (I think it was the one against the Islanders). Georges Laraque was playing.




The game was in mid-stride when all of a sudden, the camera decides to focus onto two fans of his. One of them was black, but he other one wasn't. In fact, he really wanted to be to the point where he was dressed up as (you guessed it): a minstrel.




I wish I had an image, but I couldn't find one. I can't believe Nerdlord couldn't make it down the street whereas this guy did it in front of 21, 000+ people. Oh wait, he was with a black guy, and everybody else there was white. Nevermind. Anyhoot, he got way too much air-time because they showed him again. Conlusion: Quebec has no class.

Kinda looks like Dave Mustaine.

come to think of it, Dave Mustaine makes the perfect StarScream!
I should have modelled Megatron on James Hetfield...

what the fuck?

More Palin

Have you ever noticed how Jizzabelle's voice is errily similar to Sarah Palin's?

Is it me?



''Some videos you just have to see to believe. On Thursday, Alaska Governor Sarah Palin appeared in Wasilla in order to pardon a local turkey in anticipation of Thanksgiving. This proved to be a slightly absurd but ultimately unremarkable event. But what came next was positively surreal. After the pardon Palin proceeded to do an interview with a local TV station while the turkeys were being slaughtered in the background!! Seemingly oblivious to the gruesomeness going on over her shoulder, she carries on talking for over three minutes. Watch the video above to see for yourself.''

They say you can't judge a book by its cover, but no one has ever said you can't judge a child of God by her voice, tone and general manner of speaking. I have no doubts about Palin's drive and determination. However, if she is able to produce a truly structured and forward vision, she is hidding it pretty well behind her general ''façon d'être''

p.s. yes, by the last two words, I meant to reverse the steam of the great engine known as English Use In The French Language or EUITFL, pronounced 'ayyutful'. Of which the gnome I share my appartment with is a great facilatator, why just the other day, this exchange happenned:

Sycophantic Backstabber: Et la toilette?
Pazkal: Elle est clean.
Sycophanitc Backstabber: Propre?
Paszkal: Ah, euh, oui, c'est ça.

Best Birthday For Jesus Ever!

Stephen Colbert is hosting a "War on the War on Christmas Special". I can't wait.



And besides, he's got the same fridge as the one in Chimo.

You think you know mediocrity?

Here's an excerpt from one my "partners" in our group assignment:

"Evidemment Bombardier étant une entreprise elle cherchera a agrandir ses horizons ce qui est crucial et nous amène à parler des intervenants externes. Etant producteur mondial, mais de ce cote non plus tout ne marche pas comme sur de roulettes, les autres pays avec lesquels elle fait affaire, dans certain cas elles finissent mal.
Enfin le dernier mais pas le moindre l’environnement immédiat, elle occupe pratiquement tout la base de tout bon fonctionnement d’une organisation, société ou entreprise quelconque. Ce dernier comprend les consommateurs en d’autres termes qui couvrent tout ceux qui un produits fabrique entre ces murs . Prouver maintenant à plusieurs reprises il reste et demeure même avec ses concurrents le producteur mondial, avec ses nombreuses stratégies commerciales même avec des retard dans ces recherches elle y arrive ."

There are 3 other members in our group, and they all seem to be equally impaired.

Also, can I sleep at someone's place tonight? I'm trying to avoid psychological warfare at home.

Mediocrity Is Killing Me.

I've fucking had it!!!!



Life is slowly digesting me. I feel like a piece of bubblegum lodged in the lowest reaches of Backstabber's stomach: slowly burning up in stomach acid only to be shit out in three years. Then what happens? I end up either in rat's belly, consequently killing him and spending the next week being eaten by other rats and maggots; or I end up stuck in some kind of giant vat full of shit, getting bleached, chlorined, stretched, squashed, and dumped in the bowels of the mighty Saint-Laurence River.

This does not appeal to me.

So rather than lose my mind, I've decided to travel the United States in order to document it's decline. I want to photograph, draw, and paint the bog of stench slowly enveloping the entire country. I'm leaving some time in January for an undetermined amount of time.



No more mediocrity for me. I've completely lost my "Joie de vivre" and I'm on a quest to get it back. So shrooms this week-end, New York City next week-end, then I get ready for Christmas, New Year's and my trip.

Like Being Served a Nice Fresh Beer Instead of Rat Soup

Yup. I feels good. Got me Tormentor Allegoria's Black Wine and I am ROCKING OUT! This is metal the way I love it! Furious riffs, Crushing beats, driving bass and gas huffer singing all rolled into a brutal package spiced with sonic delicacies!

This is how I feel:



Yet this is what I probably look like:



But since good times are of the essence, I says: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

Dildo, Is This Shit Random Enough for Ya?

or is this more up your alley?



Hmmmm?

Neogene park?

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/20/science/20mammoth.html?_r=2&em&oref=slogin

Scientists are talking for the first time about the old idea of resurrecting extinct species as if this staple of science fiction is a realistic possibility, saying that a living mammoth could perhaps be regenerated for as little as $10 million.

The same technology could be applied to any other extinct species from which one can obtain hair, horn, hooves, fur or feathers, and which went extinct within the last 60,000 years, the effective age limit for DNA.

So no pet Raptors? :(
This makes raptor Jesus very very sad

The CRTC done fucked up.

http://arstechnica.com/news.ars/post/20081120-canadian-regulators-allow-p2p-throttling.html

Massive Canadian ISP Bell Canada scored a big win today, as the country's telecoms regulator issued a long-awaited decision in which it concluded that Bell can continue to throttle P2P traffic at will. In a turn of events that would have seemed shocking a year ago, US regulators have now stepped in to stop P2P throttling while Canadian regulators have allowed it to continue. Have the two countries boarded different flights to the future? Possibly not; even as the Canadian Radio-television and Telecommunications Commission decided the throttling could continue, it also announced an entirely new docket that will take a top-to-bottom look at traffic management and network neutrality.

More at the link above. While I understand their perspective on the issue if they're going to throttle bandwidth during peak times then they should go right on ahead and drop all download caps. Conversely, if there are bandwidth caps then P2P users are essentially self financing all upgrades to the network. In other words Bell has no excuse, the government is stupid for even listening to them in the first place and I really hope they get torn a new one when Net Neutrality goes into full review by the CRTC.

The funny thing is, you know what their congestion measurements look like?



Calisse de tabernak. If I could switch to another ISP I really would. Ok, so I shouldn't complain, right, since I'm technically downloading movies without purchasing them and I don't even download that much (maybe 1 or 2 movies a month, at most) and even then Bell seems to regularly find me in excesses of my allotted bandwidth. However Bell is rolling out a Video on Demand service over IP planned for 2009. Apparently the Canadian government has never clearly understood what happens when you juxtapose the terms "conflict" and "interest". This stinks and Bell is going to both act as traffic cop and car manufacturer.

Waltz with Bashir

This movie looks like another amazing animated movie. Who wants to go see it with me? I think it opens at the end of December.

WE SURVIVORS.

TAKE IT EASY BRO

KEEp it together man.


Makes you fart like a overweight dead camel, but its damn worth it man.

I gots me some gears man.

When it all comes down man.

Gots the war blood in me.

I'm ready man.

you no business rat soup eating insecure motherfuckers

I was having fun on a sunday night with some friends, and then, out of the sunday nights blues, I pop up with this stupid 19bernard-induced idea of doing shrooms.
Now I gots me into some weird times before, but I allll I want to say before its too late, I can supply the whole lot of you fuckers with some good shit... anyways, as I was trying to say, I was having fun with some friends at this supper right,as one of the invitees, and because of you low barn business rat soup eating insecure motherfuckers, I pop up with this idea of shrooming, just as a fucking joke, right? But this guy takes me on the serious note, and puts a fucking gram in my mouth.
Next thing you know its 3:40 in the a.m. and I's got to try to put some air in my tires, and dont ever try doing this stupid shit when you're way too high to even tell your own cat to fuck off.
Man this is serious times motherfuckers.
I got me some gears man.
What you gonna do when it all comes down eh?

I gots the war blood in me.

Its everyone for themselves man. Even though I believe in these values of honesty, and hard working, and wealth redistribution man, I know, I'm in the know, you rat soup eating fuckers, I know some of you low class fuckers are out there, and want to eat my soup, but it aint gonna happen!
I WONT LET IT HAPPEN.

Bad drugs: General Bonerpants’ bimonthly unpopular rant

That’s right! We’re on some bad drugs right now: the Youtube, the video games, that minimalistic “cool” music with the mop tops and the ties that whines defeat. I mean is it me or have we gotten dumber in the past ten years? I’m surprised we still read books.

Seriously, though, Is this it? Have we given up as a generation? It seems as though it doesn’t matter if we fail miserably at everything as long as we look cool doing it. It’s as if our current pop culture reassures us for our shortcomings. It’s time to get out of the comfort zone. Its time to stop clapping your hands and saying yeah to four douchebags on a treadmill. I do not exclude myself from some of these vague accusations but I want to do something about our current state.

So here are some words of pseudo-negative reinforcement to the lot of you. Some call this the truth-truth game and I will target all those who have ever contributed to the Good Times. Feel free to play:

Candyman, keep working on your art as it is special because it requires actual skill and not just some neat idea. Keep it safe from those conceptual charlatans that pollute our bandwidth with their “art”. And stay away from that PS3. It’ll kill you faster than old age.

Dildo, being math smart does not make you a nerd. What is this? high school? What the fuck? You have a lucrative skill so stop putting yourself down in order to cater to the image whores. And stay away from that Xbox 360, Wii, Gameboy Advance, PSP, Tamagotchi or whatever else is in your arsenal of toys these days. I’ll see you at the gym.

Nerdlord, talking so much about video games makes YOU a nerd…lord. But at least you’ve developed a craft from it. You’re also driven by a chip on your shoulder which makes you okay in my book. Though you are not one to fade away, I just hope you don’t burn out.

Backstabber, we need to mix politics with wine like we used to. I kind of need a refresher course. And kudos on the 7am street hockey. You’re like some kind of red cheeked Energizer Bear! So apply that energy to your Masters and get it over with already. Jeez!

Woody. I miss you. I hope you’re still beating up guys who deserve it. Remember, you’re the only one among us who can get away with that kind of behavior so take advantage. Just don’t get fired.

Trebek, eat your vegetables. Also, I miss your earlier posts before the days of shameless advertising. And at this point, I almost miss the shameless advertising.

Slapmaster J, thank you for knocking some sense into this blog. Huh… I don’t think I should play the truth truth game with my girlfriend so I’ll stop here.

Raspetienne, remember where you got your name. At one point in your life, you were drinking and womanizing like a certain Russian monk. That is all I have to say.

Arilucho, you smoke too much dope. What will you do when you’ll one day wake up in the middle of Thaïland with no pants on? Consider this as a thought exercise.

Hamma, where did you go? Stop pretending that you’re more mature by disassociating yourself from this blog. Once a 19bernarder, always a 19bernarder.

Ana Bananaz, I can’t say much because I don’t know what’s going on with you these days. And that’s the problem.

Qibiche, sorry if some of us were jerks. Psychologically banishing you from the blog was a bit unbloglike. At least you’ll never read this.

Maya Papaya, I know you still read this blog. Admit it!

Masquesetparfums, I admire your entrepreneurship. You’re also one of the only original originals that I will ever meet in my lifetime. Nonetheless, you’re like my arch nemesis for some weird reason.

Bonerpants, where do you go off preaching to others as if you were holding the conch of reason? You work too much, you don’t know how to have fun anymore without hurting yourself and you’re slowly being digested by some corporate beast. It’s time to slay that beast and get the fuck out!

Anonymous, you’re a pussy for remaining anonymous.

And finally, 19 Bernard, you really need to come up with your own content. You are the embodiment of our collective downfall. You best shape up and soon!

You want good times? Let me show you good times!

Good Times for Slapmaster J

Dear Slapmaster J,

Your comment struck a nerve. Indeed, I decided to do a little work for the wimin folk in our midst. Please accept this gift of mine. I typed in 'good times' in the google search engine and pressed the ''activate'' button on my board of keys. Thereafter, I clicked on the 'Image' link of said search engine. I believe the images retrieved below will make you feel good times. Please enjoy and have them, the good times and/or the pictures. I will tell you how to find them for yourself. Go to the google search engine at http://google.com and type in 'good times' without the '' ' '' and then click on the button marked 'Google search'. After that, click on the link that says 'images' on the top left corner of your browser (net surfer).

Hey Nerdlord

No, left 4 dead can only be played 2 player split screen on the 360 sadly enough... It would be possible to have 4 players play if we somehow got 2 360s, I think, and connected them up. Or you can have 2 people play on one console and connect online for the rest.
Either way the game is a blast.

Speaking of trippy shit.

I want to borrow Candyman's PS3 so I too can create a full adder. I wonder if there's a way to implement a system clock too...

Saturday, December 27th

IS OUR NEXT SHROOM NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

?

How cool would that be? I was thinking we could either stage the event in Dildo's basement, or Candyman's cottage (13, rue des Écureuils Roux, Mont-Trembleur). Wadayasay?

I've been spending too much time at home.

Protip number 2,314

Don't leave semi empty beer bottles in your bedroom for weeks on end. It will smell like the seat of Candyman's unwashed pants after a really hot summer at Wilvie spent drinking and shoveling manure.

PAIN à l'ail... wait a second... I kinda like this one... remember this shit?

PAINt me Trendy!

According to Pitchfork, this is the lastest offering from new music hotspot Montréal! Yeah, I know, what's up with that thing on the e?

Here comes the PAIN!

That's right! I'm here to join Dildo in the raping of this blog. Enjoy! Oh yeah, and good luck trying to get that cantankerous whistling out of your head.



"Why are you doing this to us?" you may ask. Well, I figured some of my friends are going through a pretty tough time right now. So if I come off as a bitter asshole, I'll make them feel better about their own state of mind. Seems logical to me.

A gift from he that dwells in his mother's basement.

Final assignments and exam preperation is a bitch. Fuck my life.

Exhibit.

SYMPATHY FOR THE DEVIL: ART AND ROCK AND ROLL SINCE 1967


Jim Lambie, installation view of Pinball Wizard, 2007, and The Byrds (Love in a Void), 2007.



Who wants to go with me?

Gender Studies 313

Surprise! The Blog is a man!

Thanks once again BSNYC/RTMS

Salez

Here is a great waterproof-breathable-windproof glove. Fantastic for winter activities. The 2-in-1 design is rather ingenius: 1. Wear the glove normally. 2. Hand getting hot, or you need more grip: slip you hand between the shell and the liner! Voilà, 2 in 1! Also, I believe the fleece inside is the softest material known to man. Reason for selling: too bulky for this elitist.



70$ value (100$ ?!?).

* 3-layer Thermal Ply waterproof, windproof, breathable softshell fabric shell.
* Goatskin leather and mini-ripstop trim.
* Goatskin leather fingers and thumb with Circle flex palm.
* Gore® patented 2-in-1 multi-climate insulation chambers - warm chamber with enhanced grip, warmest chamber with insulated palm.
* Megaloft® with Lavawool® moisture management system and Gore-Tex® Guaranteed to Keep You Dry® waterproof, windproof, breathable insert.
* Fused zipper pocket.
* Gauntlet cinch closure.
* Elastic leash.

Yours for a friendly 40$

My Monday morning I should be studying but I find myself unwilling or unable to open a book post."

1- All this talk of sucking...


2- I might have an old wooden coffee table to give away if anyone wants.

3- I was helping ye olde ex gf pack up her boxes and I came across some old pictures from HS and from when SB, Alex and I went to Argentina. Does anybody have a halfway decent scanner so I can upload them to facebook or some such nonsense so that Nerdlord will have to reinstate his account just to see them?

4- A friend turned me on to a demo for a 4 player co-op zombie game that's basically equal parts rip off of the dead series and 28 days later so now I'm in a zombie movie watching mood. Any recommendations?

there were other things but I can't remember them...

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Although the Mad Max trilogy is one of my favorites....





... I really shouldn't have downloaded them. As an unemployed deadbeat, this is just the kind of shit I don't need lying around my hard drive. I mean.... it IS Monday afternoon right? And the last thing I need is a bad case of the Mondays, right? So watching the Mad Max trilogy would probably be the best thing to do, right?

I don't consider myself weak, however this download feels like a shard of glass stuck somewhere between my eyeball and optic nerve. I want to scratch it so bad.

Worst Movie Ever

In 1990, they released the worst superhero movie ever made. Even worse than Superman Returns. Made the same year as Tim Burton's Batman, but looking as if it had been filmed in 1969. Captain America is wearing a rubber suit, and the wings on his head are made of rubber too, and they're flapping around like rubber does. Anyways. This movie and Syco's lamest albums list made me want to create my own shit list. I give you Nerdlord's list of the 10 crappiest movies ever made:

1- Captain America
2- Lady in the water
3- Indiana Jones and the kingdom of crystal (or whatever its named)
4- Jaws: the revenge
5- Masters of the Universe
6- Pearl Harbor
7- Armageddon
8- The Island
9- The rock
10- Transformers

hello strangers

I'm sorry to announce that since moving to Seattle, I've become much too mature for your shenanigans. Quiet nights sipping aged scotch and reading Dostoevsky is my idea of fun. Thank you for your time.

Megatron

Kinda look like Willem Dafoe

The Art of Qualifying Music

It's time.

I've been meaning to come back with another Best Albums list again. For those in the lurch, please refer to some group email I sent a few years ago. Also for those in the lurch, do you really need to be put in context for a Best Albums list? Please.

Anyways, here's a top 9 best albums of my life, not limited to my lifespan, just what I know. No order. Subject to change.

Jimi Hendrix: Blues (Listening to it as I write these nectarous pixelated words)
Lagwagon: Blaze
Nine Inch Nails: The Downward Spiral
NOFX: White Trash, Two Heebs and a Bean
Rolling Stones: Hot Rocks 1964-1971 (Purist, fuck off, this is MY list)
Gza: Liquid Swords (Listening to this now)
Bob Marley: Legend
Sagacité: Abuzive Muzik (Seriously, it's bloody good!)
Metallica: Ride the Lightning (Most difficult band for which to chose a best abum)

Those of you who know these albums, love them.

Evening at Candyman's

For all those interested, I'm hosting a chill evening of staring at a screen. On the menu: Arrested Development (three season's worth).



There will be all the usual intoxicating trimmings, of course, with optional Playstation 3 exploration. It would be nice if the PS3 remained on the "touche-pipi" level. I don't mind if it escalates to a "mélange-poils", but I'd rather it not turn into a "plonge-caca". I've been playing waaaaaay too many games lately.



In any case, I'm super fucking hung-over so I don't want it to be a particularly late night.

Shaken, not stirred.

I stumbled upon this today somehow - in honor of the release of Quantum of Solace, the new Bond movie, Rotten Tomatoes has released a list of the best bond films. I find myself agreeing with most of the list but there are some odd inclusions in there - like how they ranked Living Daylights higher than License to Kill...

Pussy Galore

As an aside, anyone want to catch the new Bond movie sometime soon? I would have hated to miss Casino Royale when it was in theaters.

Could'nt Help It

I've been listening to Blaze, an album by my much-loved band Lagwagon, all day.

Here is Lullaby.

Snif, I miss the Lagwagon show. They didn't play this song, but for a brief time, the world was near perfect.



Here's the French translation of the lyrics:

Berceuse

Menant la guerre à la course aux armements du son
Baisse le son
Débranche
Capitulation imminente
Sonnant dans le nouveau Moyen-âge
Fait taire les accrocs au son
Fait piquer les silence-ophobes
Dans un songe de paix
Dans un calme oh trop bref
Ma berceuse est mortelle
Que ma berceuse soit calmante
Le silence pourait être oh si doux
Passer du statique à la violence à...
Le volume est la nouvelle monnaie
Chacun se bat pour du temps de diffusion
Tout le monde est muet
Hurlant des mots entremêlés comme s'ils étaient sourds
Big brother ne regarde plus
Il sait que nous sommes distraits et absorbés
Diffusant notre peine
Notre immagination est atrophié
Nous ne pouvons plus penser
Si, en chantant, je pouvais les faire dormir
Si, en chantant, je pourrais me rendre sourd
Ne serait-ca pas merveilleux ?
Ça ne vous semble pas merveilleux ?
Chaque génération hait la suivante
Je vais sauver les masses d'une mort lente et pénible
Je vais mettre fin à leurs jours
Les sauver de la misère progressive
Je compte
Si, en chantant, je pouvais m'endormir
Si, en chantant, je pourrais me rendre sourd
Ne serait-ca pas merveilleux ?
Ça ne vous semble pas merveilleux ?
Ma berceuse est mortelle
Que ma berceuse soit calmante
Mémorisée
Involontaire
Je pense pouvoir changer le monde.

The funny thing about Lagwagon is that their lyrics are hot when taken in the context of just listening to their songs, but are almost non-sequitur when cheking the lyrics ''on paper". Hehe, ''on paper''.

Anyways, here's a good Joey Cape-er, as heard by me: ''It's a feeling so unfamiliar Not unlike love'' or ''I'm just a bad cliché in your black book''

Oh, and Candyman, I've been meaning to make you a Concept Mix 3000 ever since the show. Essentially, I take 3 good songs from every Lagwagon album. Then I put them in a mix. Then I burn it onto a CD. Following that, I give you said CD. If you roll a 3 or higher, you'll listen to the album (a listener's listen is at least 3 listens). And then you will get to listen to music that I think you'll appreciate and grow to love. I think the bittersweet, joyful melancholy will scratch an itch you never knew you had!

Silence

I believe silence is a much undervalued thing. This is true for many spheres of my life. One of them is the art of cinema. It seems like there is constant need for quasi-viceral stimuli in movies. I wish more flicks maximised the stunning drama and heavy meaning of silence more often. I'm not saying that I want Czechoslovakian art-house fare, rather that more movies exploit the tremendous resource that is silence. Example: The beginning of There Will be Blood. Or better yet, a part of part 5 of 5 of Vice's True Norwegian Black Metal.

I hesitated to embed the video because like bikes, I feel there has been a bit too much use of embed on the blog. Luckily, when I tried to embeb the video, it failed.

Fate? Incompetence? Bad luck? Should I not have eaten that sardine-on-toast open-faced sandwich? Who really cares? I'm wearing a fur shirt right now and I think you should watch this:

An Adroit Use of Silence

Moratoriums Are for Pedestrians!

A celebration of bikes and biking!!

Scavenger Hunt. Race. Prizes. Party

Open to ALL bikers and bikes.

DATE: SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 22nd, 2008

Registration and Pre-race games at 12-2pm
Big Race from 2-5pm

Film Screening and Eats at 1757 Amherst at 6:30pm

To pre-register or for more info:
streetdogmontreal@gmail.com

The Future! (part II)

the carcass of a late albatros who ate a little too much plastic


I woke up in a good mood this morning. So of course it felt wrong, and I immediately tried to remember why I should'nt be feeling so happy. But I was in such a great and joyful state of mind that it took me way too long to remember about the ongoing genocides, the billions in hellish conditions, the bees disappearing, the consequences of their disapearing, the 25% of mammals to be extinct, the tons of scrap metal accumulating from trashed electronic gizmos we dont fucking need, the generalized carelessness and overconsumption, etc...

So to make sure none of you mistakenly falls in a state of happiness like I did this morning, I'm posting this. Feel free to do the same about any other reason not to be happy. I personnally think that, given the state of the world, being genuinely happy is a crime against humanitym, against the biosphere and against the planet, and we shouldnt let it happen to us.

THE GREAT PACIFIC OCEAN PLASTIC PATCH (theres six times more plastic in the ocean than plankton, and its getting worse every seconds!)



"I often struggle to find words that will communicate the vastness of the Pacific Ocean to people who have never been to sea. Day after day, Alguita was the only vehicle on a highway without landmarks, stretching from horizon to horizon. Yet as I gazed from the deck at the surface of what ought to have been a pristine ocean, I was confronted, as far as the eye could see, with the sight of plastic.
It seemed unbelievable, but I never found a clear spot. In the week it took to cross the subtropical high, no matter what time of day I looked, plastic debris was floating everywhere: bottles, bottle caps, wrappers, fragments. Months later, after I discussed what I had seen with the oceanographer Curtis Ebbesmeyer, perhaps the world's leading expert on flotsam, he began referring to the area as the "eastern garbage patch." But "patch" doesn't begin to convey the reality. Ebbesmeyer has estimated that the area, nearly covered with floating plastic debris, is roughly the size of Texas.
- Captain Charles Moore, the founding director of the Algalita Marine Research Foundation (AMRF).

Further suppression of happiness here.

Termination of bliss here.

Conference

Hey you guy-ys!

Howard Zinn is coming to town.
Mercredi 19 novembre 2008, 19h30, Salle Marie-Gérin-Lajoie, Pavillon Judith-Jasmin, 405, rue Ste-Catherine E.

Zinn was raised in a working-class family in Brooklyn, and flew bombing missions for the United States in World War II, an experience he now points to in shaping his opposition to war. In 1956, he became a professor at Spelman College in Atlanta, a school for black women, where he soon became involved in the Civil rights movement, which he participated in as an adviser to the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC) and chronicled, in his book SNCC: The New Abolitionists. Zinn collaborated with historian Staughton Lynd and mentored a young student named Alice Walker. When he was fired in 1963 for insubordination related to his protest work, he moved to Boston University, where he became a leading critic of the Vietnam War.

He is perhaps best known for A People's History of the United States, which presents American history through the eyes of those he feels are outside of the political and economic establishment.

The Future!

There is at least one good thing about the impending death of our collective lifestyle. No, it's not the irony that our destructive behaviour is causing the end of our destructive behaviour.

Nor is it that our destructive behaviour has brought us war.
And that with the end of mass consumption we might avoid conflict. Perhaps my history is a little foggy, but last I checked, war was in abundant supply prior to the industrial revolution.


And it isn't that we'll be treated to beautiful landscapes either.


At least good thing about the future is that we'll be able to tell our grandchildren, if we get that far, that ''In my day, life was so good, I got to walk to school downhill, both ways!''

Movie Critic!

You know when you're watching a decent movie and all along you keep imagining every worse possible ways the director could fuck it up, and then they actually manage to outbeat all of your mediocrity expectations with an ending thats coming straight out of the shit abyss!?
Well I just watched a movie that didnt follow up to this excrementious Hollywood scheme! And lemme tell you, given the long streak of disastrously shitty movies I've seen lately, its been a fucking long time it didnt happen!
The Myst is one helluva good movie!
First of all its horror!
Second its got zero known actors!
Third its intelligent, compelling, and makes you think about human nature, and confronts us with its ugly sides! And then they so completely kill the religious fuckers! Its almost not a movie, its more like a rant against religion! But then the ending wraps it all up in an almost pro-religion kinda way! But I guess its more about faith than anything else! but still! Crazy! And the CGI looks like they used real muppets so it actually looks good!
And the end is fucking amazing! Who could ask for a better unhollywood ending than this!? Last time I'd seen me an ending like that was from Carpenter's the Thing!
Anyways, go rent that movie now!
Over and out!

Wordz

In the course of some light translation, I came across this passage which, until further notice, is easily the most subtile way to convey ''makes your dick look big.''

Check it out:

''High performance, environmentally sound and very sexy, the Brief has a low rise, athletic cut that helps you make the most of what you've got''

Either that or it's the most euphemistically polite way of saying: ''your dick ain't much'' since ''tighter-fit'' condoms.

Give me a break!

Ok... I know that the 19 blog has decreased in participation over the course of the past six months, but come on! Boring fucking posts about the bike you jerk off to followed by a two year-old drawing of a schlong! Give me a break. Are you trying to suck the fun out of this blog? Need I remind you of the spirit of the 19? I hope not.



If you've got nothing good to post, don't post anything at all.

PS: I hope you're happy.. I had to shoot a random guy in the face on his birthday to get this photo. Not to mention that he was nowhere near a river or bridge, so I had to drag him around the city through alleys and rooftops until I finally got to a place to throw him in the water. An then, just as my luck would have it, he got tangled in the fucking balloons. What happened next? You got it... I had to jump in with Faceless Joe, tread water and untangle the fucking strings. And every time he would roll over he'd look at me with that remaining accusing eye. Fucker! Don't judge me!!! And that's when I judged me. Suddenly I realized that maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. Funny... but not a good idea. Oh well. At least the photo turned out.

My Dick

Is not going to suck itself.

Venting

For those who are about to not care, I say...ok.

In the process of turning Ute into a future blog post (you'll see), I've come across a few difficulties. Considering the process has lasted since, oh, December 2007, one more snafu isn't about to phase me. It will still bother me. And I have yelled. I also swore, loudly this evening. This will come as news to those who wake up every morning with astonishment that gravity is still in effect. I swear when I'm alone. A lot. It's one of those things that everyone does, nay?

Back to the frustration, and I'm leaving out a whole shitload of frustration. Anyways, the gear ratio of 41x16 is not working on my frame. The chain is either too long or too short. ''No problem'', I said, ''I'll simply use my 17T cog that's currently napping on Sheldon Brownie''.

Cog:

By the by, this had been my plan last week, frustrations in every direction prevented me from doing so. I chose not to share it with you then. Still today, I shall spare you the details.

Back once again to the frustration. Tonight I was armed with a VAR 16.

VAR 16:Mine isn't quite as badass as the one pictured. First of all, mine's new. Second, it has no red paint. Rather, it is all silver, with black rubber plastic at the handles. Anyways, it's an adjustable lockring remover. Why did I get an adjustable lockring remover? For the answer, please refer earlier in the post where I wrote: ''frustration/...\I shall spare you the details".

With the help of my virgin VAR 16 lockring remover, I removed the lockring that was guarding the 17T cog. The next part is when most people go: ''Shite, how the fuck am I going to twist off a pointy round thing (cog)?''. Most people don't have a VAR 16. Those who do inevitably also own a chain whip.

Chain whip:

A chain whip can be used for many things, including removing a cog. Luckily for this post, my cog is a track cog. My chain whip is a ''10-speed'' chain whip. Which means that the chain and cog did not perfectly aline...pffffft. Even then, it was highly likely that the cog had simply been over tightened by my riding.

Here is the point of the post. My solution, created in my head and confirmed on the internet is to the ride the wheel (on whose hub is the cog) and SLAM a skid of HELL 3000, thereby loosening the cogs grip on the hub.

I may get hurt.